Borowitz Reporthttp://web.conradreynolds.comBorowitz ReportFri, 11 Apr 2025 10:05:15 GMTPyRSS2Gen-1.1.0http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss2025-03-03 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>King Charles Downgrades Trump&#8217;s State Visit to Lunch with Prince Andrew</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup div.youtube-overlay, .typography.editor .markup div.youtube-overlay, .typography .markup div.vimeo-overlay, .typography.editor .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .typography .markup div.tiktok-wrap, 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href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158228488&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODIyODQ4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMDAzOTcxLCJleHAiOjE3NDM1OTU5NzEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.PuuvmZLY47PWyY9VbQjlUuLmQw67ARWthI1MD5V1ItM" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">King Charles Downgrades Trump&#8217;s State Visit to Lunch with Prince Andrew</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-03T12:04:14.091Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/ec3458da-a9cc-41ed-a763-a32da1e82fd7?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In an abrupt about-face, King Charles III of the United Kingdom announced on Monday that he was downgrading Donald J. Trump&#8217;s upcoming state visit to lunch with Prince Andrew.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Instead of Windsor Castle, where the state visit was to be held, the lunch between Andrew and Trump will now occur at a Pizza Express restaurant in Woking. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">According to royal sources, Andrew was &#8220;incandescent with rage&#8221; when his older brother informed him of the engagement, but the King told him, &#8220;Sorry, chap, you&#8217;ve got to take one for the team.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">After Andrew asked what he and Trump could possibly talk about over their pizza, Charles suggested, &#8220;Maybe you two can reminisce about your good times with Jeffrey Epstein.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What are some other places you&#8217;d like to see Trump visit? 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.post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: 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@media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy 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(min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA0MTIwMTUwLjMuZDI5OTE1N2U1ZWQ5MmQ1OEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4Mjk1MTkyLCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDEwOTAyMTQsImV4cCI6MTc0MzY4MjIxNCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.Bp1m8GhiAqRtsCTmDANg0EHDgUUY3OGUafqamf4Rw1o" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;When you were running for president, you didn&#8217;t have any cards," Putin shouted.&nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F055205c5-c870-4d9a-a354-d37f3e981bd6_1024x643.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Mikhail Svetlov/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>MOSCOW (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/4efe9835-dfb0-4619-a629-da7f0879ca43?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In a testy meeting at his Kremlin office on Tuesday, Vladimir Putin scolded Donald J. Trump for failing to show proper gratitude for getting him elected president of the United States. </span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">For almost an hour, Trump was on the receiving end of blistering attacks from Putin and his vice president, JD Vasilevsky.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I got you elected and you haven&#8217;t said thank you once,&#8221; Putin shouted. &#8220;When you were running for president, you didn&#8217;t have any cards. With me, you had cards.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Attempting to mend fences, Trump offered to let Putin run his next Cabinet meeting instead of Elon Musk.</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: If you had a meeting with Trump, what would you say to him? 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padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA0MjM1MjQxLjMuN2YyNjQwZTI0NjAyOWNmOUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4MzE3MTQ5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDExMzI1NTYsImV4cCI6MTc0MzcyNDU1NiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.Qvq39ChGyFcMD_ZoMP6qG2rvGlbL5gYJsKiEivwCgg0" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Musk did not mention Trump in his address.</div><div 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGdHJ1bXAtd2F0Y2hlcy1tdXNrcy1zcGVlY2gtdG8tY29uZ3Jlc3MiLCJwIjoxNTgzMTcxNDksInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQxMTMyNTU2LCJleHAiOjE3NDM3MjQ1NTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.V9dpZRH5hWd_ZtYJlw-mZySDaGYYOvP3DSc9Ew9OVy0?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvdHJ1bXAtd2F0Y2hlcy1tdXNrcy1zcGVlY2gtdG8tY29uZ3Jlc3M_dXRtX2NhbXBhaWduPWVtYWlsLWhhbGYtcG9zdCZyPTNsaXB2dCZ0b2tlbj1leUoxYzJWeVgybGtJam95TVRjMU5ETTRNVGNzSW5CdmMzUmZhV1FpT2pFMU9ETXhOekUwT1N3aWFXRjBJam94TnpReE1UTXlOVFUyTENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRNM01qUTFOVFlzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5emRDMXlaV0ZqZEdsdmJpSjkuWUhwN2l3bUhxM2FqeG55RVE5dFFMVEJLMmdvOV84SmZsLVBrOEpiUnE1ayIsInAiOjE1ODMxNzE0OSwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDExMzI1NTYsImV4cCI6MTc0MzcyNDU1NiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0._Pov6QkKKBO70KhF_sn18NRZePq8yzrUtUirNdqMmFA?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158317149&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODMxNzE0OSwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMTMyNTU2LCJleHAiOjE3NDM3MjQ1NTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.YHp7iwmHq3ajxnyEQ9tQLTBK2go9_8Jfl-Pk8JbRq5k" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Trump Watches Musk&#8217;s Speech to Congress From Last Row</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-04T23:52:49.436Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-04T23:52:49.436Z">Mar 4</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6bdee1b-fbd3-4854-9331-abb10395aa67_3300x2750.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Drew Angerer/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/3939dece-b1fa-489d-8c17-e8604e5df902?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Donald J. Trump watched Elon Musk&#8217;s historic address to Congress Tuesday night from the last row of the House chamber.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Striking a menacing tone, Musk threatened to mount lavishly funded primary campaigns against congressional Republicans unless they gave him a standing ovation after every line in his speech. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Stand up, fuckwads!&#8221; the South African bellowed, causing the entire GOP assemblage to leap to their feet.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Trump&#8217;s view of the speech was partially obstructed by Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., who sat in the second-to-last row and brought a dismembered whale&#8217;s head as his plus one.</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What would you rather watch than Trump&#8217;s speech? 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA1MTMyNjI2LjMuM2M1MzIyZTZlMWIyMDgwZEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4NDM2MTA4LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDExODE1MTAsImV4cCI6MTc0Mzc3MzUxMCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.yO_I4phwfXCCRXuqjPSKlYPHQf1OX5xR8f0b3ipuj50" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Republicans were awestruck by their leader&#8217;s ability, at the age of 78, to give such a sustained fact-free oration.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 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more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.iDeSZwNP5pYcoOwetgzktnAmiTJUsOirLY3buPQjft4?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158436108&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODQzNjEwOCwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMTgxNTEwLCJleHAiOjE3NDM3NzM1MTAsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.XSqph0e02zSIlUPVz9y7WMCK5I7xW0Rjrz981e8Z-lQ" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Trump Sets Record for Longest Speech Without Single Fact</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-05T13:26:36.535Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-05T13:26:36.535Z">Mar 5</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158436108&utm_source=substack&isFreemail=true&submitLike=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODQzNjEwOCwicmVhY3Rpb24iOiLinaQiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDExODE1MTAsImV4cCI6MTc0Mzc3MzUxMCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTIzMzc2NTYiLCJzdWIiOiJyZWFjdGlvbiJ9.IHbHqhb1q9BuGGYmG7e-xNO646To5A6bqnjhGESX7DE&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-reaction&r=3lipvt" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/ebbd0cbe-e721-4fdf-9d47-5bed6a3c9806?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report)</a><span>&#8212;In what is being called a historic performance, on Tuesday night Donald J. Trump set a new world record for delivering the longest speech that did not include a single fact.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Congressional Republicans were awestruck by their leader&#8217;s ability, at the age of 78, to give such a sustained fact-free oration.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;To stand up there for 99 minutes and not accidentally slip up even once by saying something true?&#8221; House Speaker Mike Johnson said. &#8220;He&#8217;s still got it.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Republicans contrasted Trump&#8217;s address favorably with the Democratic response of Sen. 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src="https://email.mg2.substack.com/o/eJw8kEuu8yAMRldThhGGOPAPWEvEw-2PbgIRmFa5q7_qQ50eW0dHX_RMt9pOd9TOIrk5gUUryIGZASygngXtPm_rjQo1z5RWz98rSCuV-O8CGVD4LxiJkEia6xVNQEtaoV_QG5GdkgqllghaLWqZ9KQjaqVoIQhKWpkus9xvauojdPbxZ4p1F7mv10avAMdtkHhmrn6kTCWSozu1s5YPzskB2lkvIO2b8HmQK_ToGzFTE8cIa6z7Pkrmc6Xiw0bpIx5hy9FzruUpUlqbBRfRXKitPjL_XmYZa2k-NTpL3VJ_BfYRUt19Lt-_RkdtLPi96OjUXj4wOGsLRtyd-gsAAP__EmV8HA"></body></html> 1f09c53b-f9d3-11ef-8f39-0a39ee06db20Wed, 05 Mar 2025 10:04:23 GMT2025-03-06 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Trump Warns of Increase in Transgender Mice Since Haitians Ate All the Cats</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA2MTIwMzE1LjMuNTUxNjI4ODBiNTgzMmNlNUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODQ1NTk5NywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMjYzMjA3LCJleHAiOjE3NDM4NTUyMDcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.A_DoCeEK66T9DD_W6wznCSb4uYSNAsDS-jkqw9B1c1E" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;These mice had nothing to fear because they knew that all the cats had been eaten," he claimed.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/c4457bd0-255e-4287-90b5-4673169eaa98?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/b42dabed-ee43-4f26-8ab9-d9f6c7d29ee3_1024x712.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:712,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:75568,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158455997?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb42dabed-ee43-4f26-8ab9-d9f6c7d29ee3_1024x712.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="382.421875" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb42dabed-ee43-4f26-8ab9-d9f6c7d29ee3_1024x712.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Andrew Harnik/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/fafc3e8c-4145-454c-a219-a82768ce7c20?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In one of the more ominous moments from his speech to Congress on Tuesday night, Donald J. Trump blamed a surge in transgender mice on &#8220;Haitians eating all the cats.&#8221;</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;For four years, mice swarmed over the border, looking for sex-change operations that Sleepy Joe Biden would pay for,&#8221; he alleged. &#8220;These mice had nothing to fear because they knew that all the cats had been eaten.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Vowing to usher in what he called a &#8220;golden age for cats,&#8221; he vowed to use billions in tariff revenue to establish a Strategic Cat Reserve.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Trump spent the rest of his speech listing his second-term accomplishments, boasting, &#8220;I have already caused more damage than all other presidents put together.&#8221;</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" data-component-name="StaticPoll" style="border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 12px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';width: 100%;color: rgb(54,55,55);padding: 16px 16px 8px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-header" style="margin-bottom: 4px;font-size: 12px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 500;color: rgb(119,119,119);padding: 0;">SUBSCRIBER-ONLY POLL</td></tr><tr class="poll-question" width="100%" style="vertical-align: top;font-weight: 800;color: rgb(54,55,55);font-size: 20px;line-height: 32px;margin-bottom: 8px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';"><td>Who would you rather have as president?</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.EIgjZqu-2Z6WfGRk1l5kR7aKoegYtdkxlNPan9f5DGM?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Donald Trump</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.WGzy_FiWbR719VOalvN0K1jRBcfgPaw-Q-GShOE3hLM?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">A cat</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.PD0ydgskenA0DH586ax80nWuzrtZJciPo5WREiONt5A?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">A mouse</div></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: Explain your vote in today&#8217;s poll by leaving a comment below:</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158455997&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODQ1NTk5NywiaWF0IjoxNzQxMjYzMjA2LCJleHAiOjE3NDM4NTUyMDYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.xoCMvcRru8N-EbznPXPC4ecdvZWNS_qiAzIJyRMN5Wg&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Leave a comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" 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comment</span></a></p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/22db2cd3-67c8-4f85-8aae-7ec78be319a7?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:165,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:5092,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/png&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157682219?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="62.3282967032967" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA2MTIwMzE1LjMuNTUxNjI4ODBiNTgzMmNlNUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODQ1NTk5NywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoiYm90dG9tIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMjYzMjA3LCJleHAiOjE3NDM4NTUyMDcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.4yFsiFz_2cA2iYVAMuBrZ7qy_bfT4XkJQpOQJ07FtiQ" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" src="https://email.mg-d1.substack.com/o/eJw8kE1uwyAQRk8TdrX4NXjBWSwYpimqDRYMidzTV_lRtm9GT08fBMJrbac_aieWvFoidzAz9MJqIWclpWG4h7ytVyzYAmFaA32u3Aq1sB8fhUMbJGgEa8McuFp0AgvWCdSgOctecmm44rOQXAkzqckYMUvneDROSUBz0Xy_fiUx9RE7BfidoO4s9_W74TPBUxvIHqVrGCljAfR4w3bW8sY5eWGcNmZZ7IvQeaAveO8bEmFjx4gr1H0fJdO5Yglxw_QWj7hlCJRreYikUnY2M2s-1lbvmf4umkMtLaSGZ6lb6s_APmKqe8jl89fwqI0YvUYdHdvTJ6zRygnLbl7-BwAA__-TKn0l"></body></html>55ee5e5d-fa9c-11ef-bef6-0a39ee06db20Thu, 06 Mar 2025 10:04:44 GMT2025-03-07 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Kennedy Center to Replace &#8220;Hamilton&#8221; with New Musical, &#8220;Burr&#8221;</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; 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(min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA3MTIwMzA4LjMuYWVmZTNhMjU3Y2I0M2NmOEBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODU0MjUyNCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMzQ5NDMwLCJleHAiOjE3NDM5NDE0MzAsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.UQAfLVmRQAblxTC7YyMIMAB7uIBzw42mPo7lwzjcdek" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The production will star Ted Nugent.&nbsp;</div><div 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGa2VubmVkeS1jZW50ZXItdG8tcmVwbGFjZS1oYW1pbHRvbiIsInAiOjE1ODU0MjUyNCwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDEzNDk0MzAsImV4cCI6MTc0Mzk0MTQzMCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.H2QYCOs_Q4XD3dbWY3cwLCWOiUOBttmi_hzwffwHSmM?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3Ava2VubmVkeS1jZW50ZXItdG8tcmVwbGFjZS1oYW1pbHRvbj91dG1fY2FtcGFpZ249ZW1haWwtaGFsZi1wb3N0JnI9M2xpcHZ0JnRva2VuPWV5SjFjMlZ5WDJsa0lqb3lNVGMxTkRNNE1UY3NJbkJ2YzNSZmFXUWlPakUxT0RVME1qVXlOQ3dpYVdGMElqb3hOelF4TXpRNU5ETXdMQ0psZUhBaU9qRTNORE01TkRFME16QXNJbWx6Y3lJNkluQjFZaTB5TXpNM05qVTJJaXdpYzNWaUlqb2ljRzl6ZEMxeVpXRmpkR2x2YmlKOS5zcUFiTXZvSFlfdjI4cVo3bk5LaVFObVYwLWlYTTUyLW1EZVFEWUl3MEowIiwicCI6MTU4NTQyNTI0LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MTM0OTQzMCwiZXhwIjoxNzQzOTQxNDMwLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.fOziXs61t-Vx14UXc2YIVm6afn6OrB1bGlLpTpKDxMk?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158542524&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODU0MjUyNCwiaWF0IjoxNzQxMzQ5NDMwLCJleHAiOjE3NDM5NDE0MzAsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.sqAbMvoHY_v28qZ7nNKiQNmV0-iXM52-mDeQDYIw0J0" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Kennedy Center to Replace &#8220;Hamilton&#8221; with New Musical, &#8220;Burr&#8221;</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-07T12:03:48.985Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-07T12:03:48.985Z">Mar 7</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158542524&utm_source=substack&isFreemail=true&submitLike=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODU0MjUyNCwicmVhY3Rpb24iOiLinaQiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDEzNDk0MzAsImV4cCI6MTc0Mzk0MTQzMCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTIzMzc2NTYiLCJzdWIiOiJyZWFjdGlvbiJ9.Jr2t731zM5xem5pYm16IxGnDMA52tVnm8k5F2Lz_-og&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-reaction&r=3lipvt" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple 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Trump announced on Thursday that he would replace the production with a new musical, &#8220;Burr.&#8221;</span><br><br><span>The show, which will star Ted Nugent as Aaron Burr, will be produced by a new patron of the arts, The National Rifle Association. </span><br><br><span>&#8220;&#8216;Hamilton,&#8217; quite frankly, is no great loss,&#8221; Trump said. &#8220;It was an unsuccessful musical that no one wanted tickets for.&#8221;</span><br><br><span>&#8220;Burr is my kind of American hero,&#8221; he added. &#8220;He shot a guy.&#8221; </span></p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What other offerings can we expect to see at the Kennedy Center under the Trump regime? 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzA5MDUwMTM2LjMuYTkyOGE1YmFiNzIwNWYzNEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1Nzc0MDU1NiwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MTQ5Njg1MywiZXhwIjoxNzQ0MDg4ODUzLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.KHnVy58xKU78F0TDHnK2XW4Is1YHVx37iUPxa6hCzuA" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">TBR Sunday Read</div><div class="preview" 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#777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">TBR Sunday Read </h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-09T05:03:12.106Z" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/267baf82-9f0c-453a-b945-e04f23c83be7?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Welcome to the third installment of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/3d6b9359-5e90-44c8-8457-feec62ae7e68?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Traitor of the Week</a><span>&#8212;TBR&#8217;s most widely-read series ever.</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">In this series I profile the most egregious enablers of the fascist regime presently vandalizing the US&#8212;and ask you, the reader, to choose the worst.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">An inspiration for this series is Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator in Norway whose villainy was so epic that his last name has become a synonym for traitor. </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">With apologies to Norwegians, I think the word &#8220;quisling&#8221; is ripe for an update, since the US currently has an embarrassment of traitors worthy of such enshrinement.</h3><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Each week, I highlight those who, for personal gain, are aiding and abetting the criminal cabal operating out of the White House. After I have profiled a number of Traitors of the Week, I&#8217;ll ask TBR readers to vote for America&#8217;s Top Traitor. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">One final note: some readers have suggested that President Musk and his senile toady, Donald Trump, deserve Traitor of the Week honors. While they are undeniably pillaging the US and should be brought to justice in post-coup tribunals, they aren&#8217;t, strictly speaking, quislings&#8212;they are the occupying enemy with whom the quislings are collaborating. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;margin-bottom: 0;">Having clarified my brief, then, I offer for your consideration the latest Traitor of the Week. When I asked readers to name the quisling who had done the most damage to the US, this individual was a wildly popular choice. I think you&#8217;ll agree:...</p></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: rgb(255,255,255);color: rgb(54,55,55);border-top: solid 2px #ed1c24;margin-top: 6px;"><h2 class="paywall-title" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: 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padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzEwMDQwMTMyLjMuZDQwM2I4ZWY4MGMzZTE4ZEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4MzczMjc0LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDE1Nzk2ODIsImV4cCI6MTc0NDE3MTY4MiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.HCTIWncvqvRMo7ETGbJjg502CupUJkYfXFqehzD1_Xw" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Coming to a device near you.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGYmlnLW5ld3MiLCJwIjoxNTgzNzMyNzQsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQxNTc5NjgxLCJleHAiOjE3NDQxNzE2ODEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.3RRmjRZqb5AhgK8gphsd0r0oEZ9d5DDlQBBpiNHoK50?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvYmlnLW5ld3M_dXRtX2NhbXBhaWduPWVtYWlsLWhhbGYtcG9zdCZyPTNsaXB2dCZ0b2tlbj1leUoxYzJWeVgybGtJam95TVRjMU5ETTRNVGNzSW5CdmMzUmZhV1FpT2pFMU9ETTNNekkzTkN3aWFXRjBJam94TnpReE5UYzVOamd4TENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRReE56RTJPREVzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5emRDMXlaV0ZqZEdsdmJpSjkuMEdXaERFcVpwcHg0MjZ0bW1hdGR2ZUctSFUzMzdxcGZZbHk4ODlyOU0zVSIsInAiOjE1ODM3MzI3NCwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDE1Nzk2ODEsImV4cCI6MTc0NDE3MTY4MSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.BihLgkc2yghZD-MiD_sijX2ouAI-Ty_aEmH1gB36594?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158373274&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODM3MzI3NCwiaWF0IjoxNzQxNTc5NjgxLCJleHAiOjE3NDQxNzE2ODEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.0GWhDEqZppx426tmmatdveG-HU337qpfYly889r9M3U" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Big News, My Friends!</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-10T04:03:21.971Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-10T04:03:21.971Z">Mar 10</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158373274&utm_source=substack&isFreemail=true&submitLike=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODM3MzI3NCwicmVhY3Rpb24iOiLinaQiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDE1Nzk2ODEsImV4cCI6MTc0NDE3MTY4MSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTIzMzc2NTYiLCJzdWIiOiJyZWFjdGlvbiJ9.y8PSKH2xFPwIE06wwdvgjT7TcZJ0DcrVdrHWC59rDSs&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-reaction&r=3lipvt" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';display: inline-block;font-weight: 500;border: 1px solid 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Substack this Tuesday at 11 AM Eastern!</h3><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;"><span>Each week I&#8217;ll interview a special guest who&#8217;ll help us survive our burgeoning dystopia. On Tuesday I&#8217;ll be joined by former </span><em>New York Times </em><span>columnist and winner of the Nobel Prize, Paul Krugman.</span></h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">The live broadcast is free to everyone, but paid subscribers get these additional premiums:</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">&#8212; A live chat with TBR community members during the show</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">&#8212;Access to all episodes, whenever you want to watch them, in TBR&#8217;s archives</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">If you&#8217;ve been considering upgrading to a paid subscription, this is a swell opportunity:</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;http://www.borowitzreport.com/subscribe&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Save 17% with Annual Subscription&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" href="https://substack.com/redirect/a36a038f-d1ee-438f-bf89-8f78507ebb08?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';display: inline-block;box-sizing: border-box;cursor: pointer;border: none;border-radius: 8px;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 600;text-align: center;margin: 0;opacity: 1;outline: none;white-space: nowrap;color: #ffffff !important;text-decoration: none !important;background-color: #ed1c24;padding: 12px 20px;height: auto;"><span style="color: #ffffff;text-decoration: none;">Save 17% with Annual Subscription</span></a></p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">You&#8217;ll get a notification from Substack right before the show goes live. You can watch it on the Substack app or your desktop. </h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">I&#8217;m excited to bring this series to you, and I hope you&#8217;ll be able to catch it!</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Love,</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Andy</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: Who would you like to see me interview on the show? 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14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzEwMjMwMTAzLjMuZjNiMTdhOWI1NmUzMDM0N0BtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4Nzk3Nzk5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDE2NDc5MjUsImV4cCI6MTc0NDIzOTkyNSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.bssIRO1o2DyRxc_CkyxAAjbnQJz0paiVp1S9mDW6Ju4" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">"Nothing bad is happening on Wall Street," he claimed.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fc57c485c-bd8a-489c-b841-23e294c8b0d9_1024x647.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Timothy A. Clary/AFP via Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/eb67d743-4332-435e-8ae5-39aa90cd0922?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In an emergency address from the Oval Office on Monday afternoon, Donald J. Trump commanded the American people not to check their 401k accounts.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Anyone caught checking their 409s (sic) can and will be deported,&#8221; he warned.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Asserting that he was issuing this order &#8220;for your own good,&#8221; Trump added, "Elon says there's a virus in the stock market and if you check your stocks it will spread to your body." </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Though he claimed that &#8220;nothing bad is happening on Wall Street,&#8221; he promised the American people that, in the event of a stock market crash, &#8220;I will fix it with my Sharpie.&#8221;</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" data-component-name="StaticPoll" style="border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 12px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';width: 100%;color: rgb(54,55,55);padding: 16px 16px 8px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-header" style="margin-bottom: 4px;font-size: 12px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 500;color: rgb(119,119,119);padding: 0;">SUBSCRIBER-ONLY POLL</td></tr><tr class="poll-question" width="100%" style="vertical-align: top;font-weight: 800;color: rgb(54,55,55);font-size: 20px;line-height: 32px;margin-bottom: 8px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';"><td>Name the most embarrassing failure of Trump's second term so far:</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.MjuFuJMWl-NChcgR-EwjFLGCvm5ON-cFYlNCqUghNFM?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">The economy</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.DVyfqYZp2R87Kq5YpJOaxstOBaT8C2n3Qg81EtEHidg?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Foreign policy</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.QyShCvuQh6Wmd_g8Ar_O2ABQhOb8yROBtvPN5OXg7dA?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">JD Vance</div></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-text-base email-text-b3" style="font-kerning: auto;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #363737;font-size: 16px;line-height: 24px;letter-spacing: -.3px;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzExMTUyMDQ2LjMuYWY5ZmQ1NTE0N2NiOTFhYS5yYmNlbmJtdEBtZzEuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzEuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6bnVsbCwidCI6bnVsbCwiYSI6bnVsbCwicyI6bnVsbCwiYyI6ImxpdmUtc3RyZWFtLXN0YXJ0ZWQiLCJmIjpmYWxzZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDE3MDY0NDYsImV4cCI6MTc0NDI5ODQ0NiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.EhqD9cDMoS1TlBeULPF1pl0BOrWHKdH3WeiyjS88sLs" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Andy Borowitz is live with Paul Krugman on Substack now: "Live with Andy Borowitz"</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="color:transparent;">&nbsp;</td><td align="center" width="468"><table class="" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><h3 class="pencraft pc-reset line-height-28-s562kJ font-display-nhmvtD size-24-lFU3ly weight-heavy-BCI3Mb reset-IxiVJZ" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;color: unset;list-style: none;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 800;margin: 0;line-height: 28px;font-size: 24px;text-decoration: unset;">Andy Borowitz is live with Paul Krugman on Substack now: "Live with Andy Borowitz"</h3></td></tr><tr height="20"><td></td></tr><tr><td><div class="pencraft pc-reset" align="center" 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} @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzEyMTEwMzIxLjMuNGMzYzMzMmNjMDUxNDI0OEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4Nzk5MjQ5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDE3Nzc4NDMsImV4cCI6MTc0NDM2OTg0MywiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.n9YITQqh_ayY-738Mi2bo_fDNMGo14wIGPLE0EDQA8w" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The eggs come packaged in a carton inscribed with the lyrics of &#8220;God Bless the USA&#8221; by Lee Greenwood.&nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 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more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvdHJ1bXAtc3RhcnRzLXNlbGxpbmctdHJ1bXAtZWdncy1mb3I_dXRtX2NhbXBhaWduPWVtYWlsLWhhbGYtcG9zdCZyPTNsaXB2dCZ0b2tlbj1leUoxYzJWeVgybGtJam95TVRjMU5ETTRNVGNzSW5CdmMzUmZhV1FpT2pFMU9EYzVPVEkwT1N3aWFXRjBJam94TnpReE56YzNPRFF5TENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRRek5qazRORElzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5emRDMXlaV0ZqZEdsdmJpSjkuVzJZSGhSeGRuTUMwTXhmV2k1STF2enBHd2dHUEhHcm5CVGdNRndoOFIyZyIsInAiOjE1ODc5OTI0OSwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDE3Nzc4NDIsImV4cCI6MTc0NDM2OTg0MiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.4NxKd4J1QqIh8kF8cZE3Iu6xI54eORjqmTza5_yvFBw?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158799249&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODc5OTI0OSwiaWF0IjoxNzQxNzc3ODQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDQzNjk4NDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.W2YHhRxdnMC0MxfWi5I1vzpGwgGPHGrnBTgMFwh8R2g" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Trump Starts Selling Trump Eggs for $60 an Egg</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-12T11:04:22.470Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-12T11:04:22.470Z">Mar 12</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1080" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/f21f60a4-be0b-41f7-9d68-c1ee00080173?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/2252a70e-7d30-4ff1-9068-c235ae2711aa_1080x720.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:720,&quot;width&quot;:1080,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:30919,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158799249?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2252a70e-7d30-4ff1-9068-c235ae2711aa_1080x720.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.6666666666667" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2252a70e-7d30-4ff1-9068-c235ae2711aa_1080x720.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">natasha t on Unsplash</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/bfb5328e-18b6-4f49-b000-0697d837f501?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Offering a new must-have collectible for the MAGA faithful, on Wednesday Donald J. Trump began selling Trump Eggs (TM) at a price of $60 an egg. </span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Trump called his offer a &#8220;rare chance to own eggs that were inspected by the USDA before RFK Jr. fired all the egg inspectors.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The eggs, which are being sold for $720 a dozen, come packaged in a carton inscribed with the lyrics of &#8220;God Bless the USA&#8221; by Lee Greenwood. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Seven hundred twenty dollars may seem like a lot for a dozen eggs,&#8221; Trump said. &#8220;But they&#8217;re a much better investment than the stock market.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What other products will Trump try to sell? Leave your answer below.</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158799249&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODc5OTI0OSwiaWF0IjoxNzQxNzc3ODQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDQzNjk4NDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.W2YHhRxdnMC0MxfWi5I1vzpGwgGPHGrnBTgMFwh8R2g&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Leave a comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" 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comment</span></a></p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/28c4ffa3-34fe-49a7-b219-339b7ee11569?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/08138150-ba7e-42e3-9569-7945b3ca9b59?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">WATCH: My Interview with Paul Krugman</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1158" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/08138150-ba7e-42e3-9569-7945b3ca9b59?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:760,&quot;width&quot;:1158,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:70926,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/paul-krugman-on-trumps-flaming-cybertruck&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158799249?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="360.9671848013817" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>In this time of Trumponomic insanity, you need to check out my new interview with Paul Krugman. You can watch it </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/08138150-ba7e-42e3-9569-7945b3ca9b59?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here</a><span>. </span></h3><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/e6b1524f-d4bb-45e2-88bb-a0cef4308261?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzEyMjMzNTM1LjMuOGNhMDg5NjI5YTI0YjZlZUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODkxNzg3NSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoib25seV9mcmVlIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MTgyMjc0MCwiZXhwIjoxNzQ0NDE0NzQwLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.vukz4kDbeFZf5fSGzM5ZMbYzWoLnpXe_2drqmfZNyrE" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Yes, it's even weirder than invading Greenland.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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#777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-12T23:35:43.265Z">Mar 12</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/44000b88-4b28-4beb-9fa7-7aab1ab0f040?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/69f71c82-133c-4c5d-aa8a-a84b26dcd3a8_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:77918,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158917875?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F69f71c82-133c-4c5d-aa8a-a84b26dcd3a8_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F69f71c82-133c-4c5d-aa8a-a84b26dcd3a8_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>In the </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/16a6dce3-d6dc-4918-b3a9-d6184601b978?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">first episode of my new live series</a><span> on Tuesday, I was extremely fortunate to talk to the Nobel Prize-winning economist </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/16a6dce3-d6dc-4918-b3a9-d6184601b978?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Paul Krugman</a><span>. </span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">We covered a broad range of topics in half an hour, including what might be the weirdest idea of Trump&#8217;s second term so far (and that includes annexing Canada and invading Greenland): the Strategic Crypto Reserve. </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">I asked Krugman, do you even know what that is supposed to be?</h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1158" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/16a6dce3-d6dc-4918-b3a9-d6184601b978?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:760,&quot;width&quot;:1158,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:70926,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/paul-krugman-on-trumps-flaming-cybertruck&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158799249?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="360.9671848013817" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F54d4a198-1dab-4e7a-a828-ae612cca311b_1158x760.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Krugman: I mean, the short answer to your question is no, because I have no idea what he intends or actually really what it is. I mean, cryptocurrencies, you know, it's just ones and zeros on computer servers somewhere... Crypto is just stuff that's, you know, code that has no inherent value and has found no use. One of the things that I find amazing is that people keep on thinking of cryptos as futuristic when Bitcoin was introduced in 2009. I mean, Bitcoin is older than the iPad.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">And it has yet to find any legal uses. The only thing that people really do with cryptocurrency is money laundering, ransom payments. Outside of the black economy, there is no use for this stuff. Now, Trump is going to... accumulate a reserve, which means accumulating basically the codes that say that this particular string of ones and zeros is yours. What you do with it, I don't know. I mean, it's not like the Strategic Petroleum Reserve, where you can release oil from the places where it's stored in case of an energy emergency. In this case, particularly since there are no legitimate uses for this stuff.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">I mean, you can use it, I guess, to pay off criminal organizations around the world or something. Yeah. It's one of the more bizarre things which can only really be explained, I think, by following the real money, following who's been paid off by this industry.</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;"><span>In addition to other topics&#8212;tariffs, mass deportations, and how much smarter the new Canadian PM is than Trump&#8212;I asked Krugman how he manages to stay sane amid the madness he has to write about every day. (You can probably understand why I sought this particular advice.) He came through with a great idea that all of us can put to use, starting right now. Watch the full interview </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/16a6dce3-d6dc-4918-b3a9-d6184601b978?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here</a><span>.</span></h4><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/1e3a306e-27c6-4904-9876-17e0a20fd553?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:165,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:5092,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/png&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157682219?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="62.3282967032967" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><span>To watch this and every episode of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/16a6dce3-d6dc-4918-b3a9-d6184601b978?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Andy Borowitz Show</a><span>&#8212;including next week&#8217;s with Robert Reich&#8212;consider becoming a paid subscriber:</span></h1><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/subscribe&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Save 17% with Annual Subscription&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" href="https://substack.com/redirect/a1d6086c-36c0-4057-b3fc-35acfecb7ea1?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';display: inline-block;box-sizing: border-box;cursor: pointer;border: none;border-radius: 8px;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 600;text-align: center;margin: 0;opacity: 1;outline: none;white-space: nowrap;color: #ffffff !important;text-decoration: none !important;background-color: #ed1c24;padding: 12px 20px;height: auto;"><span style="color: #ffffff;text-decoration: none;">Save 17% with Annual Subscription</span></a></p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-bottom: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" 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.typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzEzMTUwOTM1LjMuNTdhOGNmOGRlYTdhOTQzZEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1NzgxMDQ5NiwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQxODc4ODEzLCJleHAiOjE3NDQ0NzA4MTMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.owM-OcZNBMUKo-Nz0jzrLFGCaiLKU3Ec9MI5_fMi9a8" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">A lesson from the not-so-distant past.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div 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data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e775e14e-51b9-4cdd-ab65-14243a6ad2a0_792x609.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:609,&quot;width&quot;:792,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:106587,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157810496?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe775e14e-51b9-4cdd-ab65-14243a6ad2a0_792x609.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="422.9166666666667" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe775e14e-51b9-4cdd-ab65-14243a6ad2a0_792x609.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Geoff Livingston</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>In a recent column, </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/b00838c1-333e-4f53-bfb2-cde4ce3caa24?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">I compared Elon Musk to George III of Great Britain</a><span>&#8212;noting that Americans get pretty pissed off when an unelected rich foreigner starts messing with their taxes. The protest sign above shows that I&#8217;m not the only one making that connection.</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Could we be on the brink of a tax revolt? And what would it achieve?</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">These questions aren&#8217;t the kooky musings of a Revolutionary War reenactor. There was, in fact, a major tax revolt in the not-so-distant past&#8212;and it succeeded in bringing down a government. </h3><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In 1987, Margaret Thatcher led the UK&#8217;s Conservative Party to a massive landslide, becoming the first prime minister since 1820 to win three straight general elections. Her campaign slogan had a triumphalist, Trumpian ring to it: &#8220;It&#8217;s Great to be Great Again.&#8221; </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">She appeared unstoppable&#8212;but, throbbing with hubris, she was about to commit an act of fatal overreach.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Thatcher implemented the &#8220;Community Charge,&#8221; a poll tax that levied the same amount on every UK citizen regardless of wealth. Taxpayers across the country saw the tax for what it was&#8212;Thatcher&#8217;s latest attack on those at the bottom of the economic ladder.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The ensuing revolt reached critical mass on March 31, 1990, when 200,000 anti-tax protesters filled London&#8217;s Trafalgar Square. </p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="792" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/f4683dd3-ca7e-4021-af2f-fb7ac327244a?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/6ab4922e-ad27-40f6-bfd8-fc1c7f4c5546_792x597.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:597,&quot;width&quot;:792,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:70672,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157810496?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6ab4922e-ad27-40f6-bfd8-fc1c7f4c5546_792x597.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="414.5833333333333" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F6ab4922e-ad27-40f6-bfd8-fc1c7f4c5546_792x597.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Protesters in London on March 31, 1990. (Richard Baker / In Pictures via Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Ultimately, 18 million Britons refused to pay Thatcher&#8217;s tax, and local authorities couldn&#8217;t enforce its collection. South Yorkshire authorities, for example, called the arrest of tax resisters "physically impossible for the police because of the large number of defaulters.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">On November 22, 1990, Thatcher resigned, her voice breaking as she left 10 Downing Street. Her political career was over.</p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/75f0d90c-5920-494e-a64a-ec402a656510?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/2cfbc5b5-5e74-4dfd-b9a2-2ac946faebf9_1024x692.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:692,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:102443,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157810496?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2cfbc5b5-5e74-4dfd-b9a2-2ac946faebf9_1024x692.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="371.6796875" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2cfbc5b5-5e74-4dfd-b9a2-2ac946faebf9_1024x692.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Richard Baker / In Pictures via Getty Image</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Could Elon Musk&#8217;s criminal mishandling of American taxpayers&#8217; money result in a similar downfall for MAGA? </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">As the Trump regime shreds the social safety net while enacting trillions of dollars in tax cuts for the wealthiest, anger has already boiled over at town halls (and Tesla dealerships) across the country.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Republicans may be about to learn an unpleasant lesson: you can ban the teaching of history, but that won&#8217;t keep it from repeating. </p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: How are you resisting this fascist regime? 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src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJw8kE2u5CAMBk_T7CaCGAJZcJbIAacHTQIRmG5lTv_UP3rbslUqfQGZ7qVe_iyNRfQT4GaiIK-sVs7OGqSgA9O-3ClTRaa4IH-vzilQ4yj--ogUJnAbobQRrZzNBDgDBi0BVdhE8qMcjQQFysgZzACDsejC5iKhxVlDvGl53P9EObS-NsbwbwjlEKktW6V3gufaSbxCF-wxUQ7k6UH1KvmLU_TKWKeknqcP4eskn-nZdmKmKs6-LqEcR8-Jr4UyrjvFr7ivewrIqeSXaASwk5lE9Wup5Zn4_03LUHLFWOnKZY_tHdj6GsuBKf_-VTpLZcGfTXuj-vYpazQ4ZcXDjz8BAAD__-3qfnw"></body></html>b11e16c9-002d-11f0-bd62-0a39ee06db20Thu, 13 Mar 2025 13:07:50 GMT2025-03-14 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Trump's 200% Tariff on European Alcohol Causes Pete Hegseth to Angrily Resign</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE0MTEwMDU5LjMuOGZhNjQ3M2M3NTc4ZDQxZEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTAwMTAxNiwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQxOTUwNTY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDQ1NDI1NjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.oJa0kyIf2LvyVNUauza-TxER-rvpOr21FoGJqtUZE8w" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The departing Defense Secretary called the tariffs "an act of war."</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/77d2ce66-4122-49f9-9b38-564b33051b51?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Donald J. Trump&#8217;s threatened 200 percent tariff on alcohol from the European Union has caused Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth to angrily resign, the Pentagon confirmed on Friday.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Speaking to reporters, Hegseth said that he considered the tariffs on &#8220;Irish whiskey, French Sancerre, and the exquisite sherry of Portugal&#8221; to be &#8220;an act of war.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In an eleventh-hour bid to keep Hegseth on board, Eric Trump, the president of Trump Winery, offered Hegseth a free lifetime supply of the company&#8217;s products, but was immediately rebuffed.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I&#8217;ve had those Trump wines and they taste like ass,&#8221; Hegseth said. &#8220;Jesus, I&#8217;d rather be sober.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What&#8217;s a more appropriate job for Pete Hegseth? 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.typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE1MTEwMjQ2LjMuZjg0MWI5M2ZjZWJmYWZjOUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODk1MzExMSwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MjAzNjg0MywiZXhwIjoxNzQ0NjI4ODQzLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.K2Z_qLs04MhKjKg3lhrJNu87PYNIRnij5PgoFsbmiEw" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (59 mins) | TBR Podcast Special</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div 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0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-15T11:03:26.442Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 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padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE2MTEwMzA4LjMuYWE0NGRjYjNhOTk0NWEyMUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4NzMwMzUxLCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJvbmx5X3BhaWQiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyMTIzNDgzLCJleHAiOjE3NDQ3MTU0ODMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.8IZiYRC_HMW7TKHfcAUkYstCCn7G4fdp5uwsqL0KDCc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">TBR Sunday Read</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGdHJhaXRvci1vZi10aGUtd2Vlay1xdWlzbGluZy1uby00IiwicCI6MTU4NzMwMzUxLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MjEyMzQ4MiwiZXhwIjoxNzQ0NzE1NDgyLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.Vpnukt6f-0M9WOwj8vB94fkLOU_Znd7xu7Q9UnOG8gc?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.PpDfUStHp44Fng-wi3hxvbMgcTyjdzy1nvakuA_szNs?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158730351&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODczMDM1MSwiaWF0IjoxNzQyMTIzNDgyLCJleHAiOjE3NDQ3MTU0ODIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.GX3oJzo7NZMzyQ-kJzPAMeRKka1B4ndCbKmJMrR_GII" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Traitor of the Week: Quisling No. 4</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">TBR Sunday Read</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-16T11:04:43.708Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-16T11:04:43.708Z">Mar 16</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/657d8ce2-696a-474a-93c0-b222fdbcebbc?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Welcome to the fourth installment of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/d0494c20-fca6-4cd9-a803-f9668b717c5d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Traitor of the Week</a><span>&#8212;TBR&#8217;s most-read series ever.</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">In this series I profile the most egregious enablers of the fascist regime presently vandalizing the US&#8212;and ask you, the reader, to choose the worst.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">An inspiration for this series is Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator in Norway whose villainy was so epic that his last name has become a synonym for traitor.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">With apologies to Norwegians, I think the word &#8220;quisling&#8221; is ripe for an update, since the US currently has an embarrassment of traitors worthy of such enshrinement.</h3><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Each week, I highlight those who, for personal gain, are aiding and abetting the criminal cabal operating out of the White House. After I have profiled a number of Traitors of the Week, I&#8217;ll ask TBR readers to vote for America&#8217;s Top Traitor.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">One final note: some readers have suggested that President Musk and his senile toady, Donald Trump, deserve Traitor of the Week honors. While they are undeniably pillaging the US and should be brought to justice in post-coup tribunals, they aren&#8217;t, strictly speaking, quislings&#8212;they are the occupying enemy with whom the quislings are collaborating.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;margin-bottom: 0;">Having clarified my brief, then, I offer for your consideration the latest Traitor of the Week. I think you&#8217;ll agree that this one was a no-brainer:...</p></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: rgb(255,255,255);color: rgb(54,55,55);border-top: solid 2px #ed1c24;margin-top: 6px;"><h2 class="paywall-title" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: 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.post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE3MTEwMzAzLjMuYzM4ZDgxZTBhODMxMDc0MkBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1ODk5NzIzOSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyMjA5OTMxLCJleHAiOjE3NDQ4MDE5MzEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.DkBgWGrttYx_vikBlJqPpGAIXajLdOY7WAq6GxmU3JY" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">His new podiatrist, Dr. Mehmet Oz, composed the note.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa760f9fb-1f78-4f45-9229-928396e20953_1080x672.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Nic Amaya on Unsplash</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/f01a1771-532b-4f5f-acb2-f4fc81a4283d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Demonstrating his seriousness about declaring war on Canada, on Monday Donald J. Trump obtained a medical note from his new podiatrist exempting him from military service.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The podiatrist, Dr. Mehmet Oz, indicated in the note that a &#8220;Vietnam War-era issue involving bone spurs&#8221; would prevent Trump from participating in an invasion of America&#8217;s northern neighbor.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;President Trump&#8217;s bone spurs would become dangerously inflamed if exposed to Canada&#8217;s frozen tundra,&#8221; Oz wrote. &#8220;If he decides to put boots on the ground, his feet should not be in those boots.&#8221;</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" 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Symbol';"><td>Who would you most like to see drafted into the army?</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.aXmDDWnnMVcqfjqvPdw3m-vBoSAcTOryUUzBocYWGoc?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Donald Trump</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.U2WJz6JDz7cmPlGpqqLH9Lim_cOmbNd7zdiJ1IXbZYs?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: 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absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } 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(max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { 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line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE4MTgyNjI2LjMuOGQ0ZjBkMmY1NTNiNzc0MkBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTM1MzYwOSwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MjMyMjYyNSwiZXhwIjoxNzQ0OTE0NjI1LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0._0el7kV9tv9c2KaZu3NVC4FnZb3tuJ2zOnVYT0swTOc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (26 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" 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Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">The Andy Borowitz Show</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-18T18:26:34.758Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_270,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%402x.png" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_135,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button.png, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_270,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%402x.png 2x, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_405,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%403x.png 3x" width="135" alt="Start writing" height="40" style="max-width: 550px;border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;"></a></p></div></div></td><td></td></tr></tbody></table><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE4MTgyNjI2LjMuOGQ0ZjBkMmY1NTNiNzc0MkBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTM1MzYwOSwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6ImJvdHRvbSIsImlhdCI6MTc0MjMyMjYyNSwiZXhwIjoxNzQ0OTE0NjI1LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.P6Le5BJ_D1mXCCkEsXjXixRJvG28HC0GRVS5Oz5HPSs" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJxEkEtOxDAQBU8z3hH5n2Ths1htd2ewSOzIH1A4PZoZBNvqVqn0InS6l3q5s7TO0FkFm0FGTsxaKimtXBkdkHZ_p0wVOqGH_n812lj27nAJkQu78aCWNUhjzQq4GqvFFpXhK0tOcmm4EotYpJV2UtOCeuMoN2NUmGctb5of9zfkUxuhdYgfUywHS81vlZ4JrtdB7BHqYWCiHMmVvF_-hIQvntAJsyqjLF9fpF8nubNghNbZOYKP5ThGTv3ylCHshL_aEfYUoaeSHxap1GyNZdWFUstX6t83zWPJFbDSlcuO7ZnXRsByQMp_f5XOUjvrr0VHo_r0idlotYiZfTr5EwAA__85LXv3"></body></html>4f1ccee6-0434-11f0-a3f6-0a39ee06db20Tue, 18 Mar 2025 16:05:16 GMT2025-03-19 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Nation Rocked by Jarring Spectacle of Republican Showing Respect for Constitution</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzE5MTEwMzI2LjMuNWVmMTMzMGRmZGRjMWRhMEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTM2MjcwOCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyMzgyNjg5LCJleHAiOjE3NDQ5NzQ2ODksImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.xxUmkZ5s43-zo203YAwl7GyPnGTsF1uLcwIU_9pvTm0" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">"Maybe it's a different John Roberts?" one American wondered.&nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe00cb2dd-64bc-4b7f-af14-48a1ff3de621_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Tom Williams/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/9c268d33-5b7d-40fb-8695-7a18d14032b3?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Millions of Americans were gobsmacked on Tuesday upon hearing that a prominent Republican official had shown respect for the United States Constitution.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Across the country, U.S. residents expressed shock and disbelief that a member of the GOP had openly validated the rule of law.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;At first I thought it was a hoax,&#8221; said one American, echoing the views of many. &#8220;Then I was like, maybe it&#8217;s a different John Roberts? It&#8217;s a pretty common name.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">At the White House, a furious Donald J. Trump said that the Constitution &#8220;isn&#8217;t worth the paper it&#8217;s printed on,&#8221; noting, "When I was stealing documents I never even considered taking it."</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In his harshest rebuke of the 238-year-old document, he alleged, &#8220;The Constitution has treated me very unfairly.&#8221;</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/0c7e3d23-fb49-4ab1-b794-2a04e0a4289d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Watch: Robert Reich Breaks Down Donald Trump&#8217;s Very Bad Day</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/0c7e3d23-fb49-4ab1-b794-2a04e0a4289d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/d24abfb2-fa0a-4817-9b98-3a8d781cadce_1672x1030.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:897,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:83954,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/donald-trumps-very-bad-day-an-interview&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/159362708?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd24abfb2-fa0a-4817-9b98-3a8d781cadce_1672x1030.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="338.8392857142857" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd24abfb2-fa0a-4817-9b98-3a8d781cadce_1672x1030.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Chief Justice John Roberts just gave Donald Trump a worse spanking than he ever got from Stormy Daniels. In this </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/0c7e3d23-fb49-4ab1-b794-2a04e0a4289d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">brand new episode of my show</a><span>, the legendary Robert Reich explains just how bad this news is for the Felon-in-Chief. </span></h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/60a4eab3-3e46-4869-8767-28fad3a1145e?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/b5aadd89-06d2-4a4f-85fa-b3c3ea07926f?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Democracy Dies When Billionaires Own Newspapers: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today.</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="848" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" 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src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJw8kEnO3CAQRk_T7GIx2AwLzmIBVe6g2GBB0S3n9FEP-bevSk9PXwqE99ouf9ZODLxWYVuAoRdmlspKIxzDI-R9vWPBFghhDfT_qq3jTrHf3oBYknbGJmGk3HTU0YHlwSkRZ8uBZS-5XLgSTgiupJ7UtOAmlOKwASQBgd9mftx_AZ_6iJ1C-jOlerDc163hO8FTG8heoWsYkLEk9PjAdtXyxRm8WJzS0nD7IXSd6As--45E2Ng54prqcYyS6VqxhLgjfMUj7jkFyrW8RFIpoxfNmo-11Wemv7eZp1pagIZXqTv0d2AfEeoRcvn5a3jWRow-m46O7e0TZpmVFYY9vPwXAAD__wxKfbw"></body></html>37e7e797-04cb-11f0-96fb-0a39ee06db20Wed, 19 Mar 2025 10:05:32 GMT2025-03-20 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Thank You &#10084;&#65039;</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .typography 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" 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style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.BYOY2V_gxl_3GvFF76SPK34jL0oasc54g_0EMPewGyQ?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none 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href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=158671886&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1ODY3MTg4NiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyNDY5MDM0LCJleHAiOjE3NDUwNjEwMzQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.-wSZI3zKDVP4mbOZ_NoHr30hrv4r0egvjluNLgRnkm4" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Thank You &#10084;&#65039;</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">Warning: This post contains heartfelt statements.</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-20T11:03:09.762Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-20T11:03:09.762Z">Mar 20</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/ff10b042-2fd8-4d03-bd1e-3c4d558f1824?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa369c798-e36c-4ff7-9905-95474ab2175d_3024x2732.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Dear Reader,</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">This week marks the one-year anniversary of TBR&#8217;s relaunch as an independent newsletter. I want to take a moment to thank you for reading my posts. Working for you is the best job I&#8217;ve ever had.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">I also want to thank those of you who have shared my posts with others. Thanks to you, The Borowitz Report now has readers in 175 countries. That&#8217;s even more countries than Donald Trump has alienated.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">And last but not least, I want to thank all of you who leave such smart and funny comments on my posts. Reading what you have to say is always a high point of my day.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"> Over the past twelve months, TBR readers have formed something truly remarkable: a community. This recent note I received from a subscriber named Gloria meant a lot to me: &#8220;You not only keep me informed, but also help me feel part of a group."</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"> I love being part of this group with you. We&#8217;re living in a dark age. But laughter is better than crying. And mockery trumps tyranny. </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>We&#8217;ll get through this&#8212;together.</span><br><br><span>Love,</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Andy</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">P.S. As a token of my appreciation, here is a recent photo of my handsome friend Cookie.</h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="871" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/504cf0aa-1d7e-4575-af45-1dac83335d22?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/0471c86d-903a-4660-a3e6-c8275194722a_871x907.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:907,&quot;width&quot;:871,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:140781,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/158671886?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F0471c86d-903a-4660-a3e6-c8275194722a_871x907.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="572.7324913892078" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F0471c86d-903a-4660-a3e6-c8275194722a_871x907.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/50bc82b3-4696-480c-a904-13a577688c3b?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:165,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:5092,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/png&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/157682219?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="62.3282967032967" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/15282a54-a0b4-41fc-a08c-795aa076d082?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Now More Than Ever: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today.</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="848" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/7c679543-8ac7-4cf8-aa22-c921f9d46dd3?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzIwMTEwMTU2LjMuNmFkNzNmM2JjYmQ1NmVlNEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU4NjcxODg2LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJib3R0b20iLCJpYXQiOjE3NDI0NjkwMzUsImV4cCI6MTc0NTA2MTAzNSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.SxGgkFGhhbk2qcBN3fZxk8qxlg44DCk4OFSF3HEeE3I" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" src="https://email.mg2.substack.com/o/eJw8kEuOwyAQBU8TlhZ_8IKzWHzaGTQ2WNAk8px-FCfKtrpVKr3oEe61ne6oHUlyMjGrLAHHjORSz1TPBHaft-UOBZpHSIvH71Uoqi35cUYJswIwCHaepYiwMjqbFIwwVlPNSXacckUFp4xRpvQkJu2TEasIMSSlAeRN0v3Opz5CRx9_p1h3kvuyNrgCHLYB5JW5-JEylAgOHtDOWj44J8eU1YZZq98EzwNcgWffABEaOUZYYt33UTKeCxQfNkgf8Qhbjh5zLS8RF8JopUlzobb6zPh3kzTW0nxqcJa6pX4F9hFS3X0u378GR21I8L3o6NAuHzNKCssMeTj-HwAA___fxnzw"></body></html>c89347c6-0594-11f0-8b18-0a39ee06db20Thu, 20 Mar 2025 10:08:22 GMT2025-03-21 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Trump Forced to Listen to 45 Minutes of Balalaika Music After Putin Puts Him on Hold</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzIxMTEwMDM2LjMuNjJhYWQ1YTc0MTcxMGJlNEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTQ4MTYwNCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyNTU1MjQxLCJleHAiOjE3NDUxNDcyNDEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.phTv8_Lb67D7-ogT_GrOynbSX3hoRUH1UL35eS7_TBg" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Trump took to Truth Social to declare it a &#8220;perfect phone call.&#8221;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-21T11:00:47.132Z">Mar 21</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/708c65bf-b717-40ea-b987-6539635f8aeb?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Negotiations over Ukraine appeared to stall on Friday after Russian President Vladimir Putin kept Donald Trump on hold for 45 minutes listening to balalaika music.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">According to White House sources, Trump consumed 18 cans of Diet Coke during the lengthy musical interlude.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Although the Russian president never picked up his call, Trump took to Truth Social to declare it a &#8220;perfect phone call.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;President Putin honored me by ordering his Russian banjo players to sarrinade (sic) me for ALMOST AN HOUR!&#8221; Trump wrote. &#8220;He never would have done that for Sleepy Joe!&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What on-hold music would you force Trump to listen to? 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzIzMDQwMTQ4LjMuOWMwNjdiMTBiZDI2N2M0NUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5MjIzMjMxLCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJvbmx5X3BhaWQiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyNzAyODIwLCJleHAiOjE3NDUyOTQ4MjAsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.7HrMgQf_tjPqfxP8M3Ubzy9KVSw_t06GUbwvEi1_Bug" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">TBR Sunday Read</div><div class="preview" 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" 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32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvdHJhaXRvci1vZi10aGUtd2Vlay1xdWlzbGluZy1uby01P3V0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1oYWxmLXBvc3Qmcj0zbGlwdnQmdG9rZW49ZXlKMWMyVnlYMmxrSWpveU1UYzFORE00TVRjc0luQnZjM1JmYVdRaU9qRTFPVEl5TXpJek1Td2lhV0YwSWpveE56UXlOekF5T0RFNUxDSmxlSEFpT2pFM05EVXlPVFE0TVRrc0ltbHpjeUk2SW5CMVlpMHlNek0zTmpVMklpd2ljM1ZpSWpvaWNHOXpkQzF5WldGamRHbHZiaUo5LkY5cHZDd0RvMnNWVGNhc09fQjA4Ynp0eUR6cWxFWGR5SGtEX0plOU0yNG8iLCJwIjoxNTkyMjMyMzEsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQyNzAyODE5LCJleHAiOjE3NDUyOTQ4MTksImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.gTsztbUFWWzRjbaCaFFjJqg7n1PlZIbQBs3lEcvhzT4?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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#777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">TBR Sunday Read</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-23T04:02:51.196Z" 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23</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/40d76882-7021-4319-bf42-f64b9bc95c21?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Welcome to the fifth installment of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/10b6fe2c-994b-4b1f-b039-88f7b274bb77?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Traitor of the Week</a><span>&#8212;TBR&#8217;s most popular series ever!</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">In this series I profile the most egregious enablers of the fascist regime presently vandalizing the US&#8212;and ask you, the reader, to choose the worst.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">An inspiration for this series is Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator in Norway whose villainy was so epic that his last name has become a synonym for traitor.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">With apologies to Norwegians, I think the word &#8220;quisling&#8221; is ripe for an update, since the US currently has an embarrassment of traitors worthy of such enshrinement.</h3><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Each week, I highlight those who, for personal gain, are aiding and abetting the criminal cabal operating out of the White House. After I have profiled a number of Traitors of the Week, I&#8217;ll ask TBR readers to vote for America&#8217;s Top Traitor.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">One final note: some readers have suggested that President Musk and his senile toady, Donald Trump, deserve Traitor of the Week honors. While they are undeniably pillaging the US and should be brought to justice in post-coup tribunals, they aren&#8217;t, strictly speaking, quislings&#8212;they are the occupying enemy with whom the quislings are collaborating.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;margin-bottom: 0;">Having clarified my brief, then, I offer for your consideration the latest Traitor of the Week. From the very first week of this series, this person has been nominated by an overwhelming number of readers. Finally, the wait is over:...</p></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: rgb(255,255,255);color: rgb(54,55,55);border-top: solid 2px #ed1c24;margin-top: 6px;"><h2 class="paywall-title" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: 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@media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI0MTEwMzQxLjMuOTZkNzhkNTA4MWRiNTllN0BtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU3MTA1OTQ5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDI4MTQ4NTcsImV4cCI6MTc0NTQwNjg1NywiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.h-laEN27RSI2GMtS-n0lxDX4gh_7H8jJGCbrxcsl2Ck" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The South African businessman frantically screamed to no avail.&nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGbXVzay1hbmQtZG9nZS10ZWFtLXRyYXBwZWQtaW5zaWRlIiwicCI6MTU3MTA1OTQ5LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MjgxNDg1NiwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1NDA2ODU2LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.aelNpALFUablMMqQmWzTmj6lwc1Ivewb_lM4G71Brp8?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.-F3INFGzkrrNsnpeJ2OxJnkGtYUtys_hdBEB85049Y4?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=157105949&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1NzEwNTk0OSwiaWF0IjoxNzQyODE0ODU2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU0MDY4NTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.8O0vVWf5AN4J3DgBjiiMffcgiyrgrRf6DvmIfi7fUOE" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Elon Musk Trapped Inside Self-locking Cybertruck</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-24T11:05:52.959Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-24T11:05:52.959Z">Mar 24</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td 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!important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Suzanne Cordeiro/AFP via Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/a0299365-03a7-4e59-a366-4fe24bc7cc45?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Disaster struck the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) on Monday after Elon Musk and his team of teenage aides became trapped inside a self-locking Cybertruck.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The DOGE crew found themselves imprisoned in the vehicle after pulling into the parking lot of the Education Department, which they had come to dismantle.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">A frantically screaming Musk received no help from passing Ed. Dept. employees, who said they had just been terminated and were no longer available.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Witnesses said that Musk&#8217;s desperate pounding on the interior of the Cybertruck failed to free him but did send several pieces of metal trim flying off its exterior.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Davis Logsdon, a constitutional scholar at the University of Minnesota, called Musk&#8217;s imprisonment inside the vehicle a &#8220;positive development for American democracy,&#8221; adding, &#8220;The Cybertruck is our guardrail.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: If you saw Elon Musk trapped inside a Cybertruck, what would you do? 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border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI0MjEyOTAwLjMuZjk2YWI1MzUwZDEwZjc1OUBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTc3Nzg2MywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyODUxOTQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDU0NDM5NDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.OJ84hsVyX5UDp-u0KVcnp4yFHisREmjSOQa7OoYiOjk" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;I should never drink and text, and so I am giving up texting.&#8221;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGYW1lcmljYW5zLWRlbWFuZC1icmVhdGhhbHl6ZXItYmUiLCJwIjoxNTk3Nzc4NjMsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQyODUxOTQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDU0NDM5NDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.DPrIswGpGwkbtbrY0awaGNTxWn-O42ExKa3dxrofZnI?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvYW1lcmljYW5zLWRlbWFuZC1icmVhdGhhbHl6ZXItYmU_dXRtX2NhbXBhaWduPWVtYWlsLWhhbGYtcG9zdCZyPTNsaXB2dCZ0b2tlbj1leUoxYzJWeVgybGtJam95TVRjMU5ETTRNVGNzSW5CdmMzUmZhV1FpT2pFMU9UYzNOemcyTXl3aWFXRjBJam94TnpReU9EVXhPVFF5TENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRVME5ETTVORElzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5emRDMXlaV0ZqZEdsdmJpSjkuMFNTUktjLUw1ZG9mVjB3ZHF6NFBNdjJMd2puZHVWVDBhTUI3U09MTHlBUSIsInAiOjE1OTc3Nzg2MywicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDI4NTE5NDIsImV4cCI6MTc0NTQ0Mzk0MiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.wiVAzuIj84d2kGG1O1JtbyJkH69IzW1OAugC0aDSrhs?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159777863&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTc3Nzg2MywiaWF0IjoxNzQyODUxOTQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDU0NDM5NDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.0SSRKc-L5dofV0wdqz4PMv2LwjnduVT0aMB7SOLLyAQ" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Americans Demand Breathalyzer Be Attached to Pete Hegseth&#8217;s Phone</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-24T21:29:07.948Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-24T21:29:07.948Z">Mar 24</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI1MTEwMjIyLjMuMTkwZGVmNmE1NjYzNzBlZEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5NzQ5MjY1LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDI5MDEwMjUsImV4cCI6MTc0NTQ5MzAyNSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.iZ6mxUrt5hilWsjJepc5sUK16cdzli4MQDc0WFpQ6fc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The American visitors will be greeted &#8220;the moment they step off the plane," a Greenlandic spokesman said. &nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="862" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/0485a114-f36c-4dac-bf0d-cd3650de0e23?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/503f4677-1586-407d-bfdd-5eb332d29c27_862x762.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:762,&quot;width&quot;:862,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:87903,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/159749265?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F503f4677-1586-407d-bfdd-5eb332d29c27_862x762.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="486.1948955916473" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F503f4677-1586-407d-bfdd-5eb332d29c27_862x762.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Michael Hamments on Unsplash</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>GREENLAND (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/5b9c50fc-374e-45b7-8616-8b359e2680ef?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;The government of Greenland has named a special ambassador to greet members of the Trump administration when they visit the territory this week, a Greenlandic official announced on Tuesday.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The government spokesman, Hartvig Dorkelson, said that the newly-appointed ambassador will meet the American visitors &#8220;the moment they step off the plane.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;We know that members of this delegation are very interested in Greenland&#8217;s natural resources,&#8221; the spokesman said. &#8220;Thanks to our ambassador, they will have an encounter with Greenlandic nature that they won&#8217;t soon forget.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">According to the spokesman, the ambassador&#8217;s plans for the visitors include lunch.</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" data-component-name="StaticPoll" style="border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 12px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';width: 100%;color: rgb(54,55,55);padding: 16px 16px 8px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-header" style="margin-bottom: 4px;font-size: 12px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 500;color: rgb(119,119,119);padding: 0;">POLL</td></tr><tr class="poll-question" width="100%" style="vertical-align: top;font-weight: 800;color: rgb(54,55,55);font-size: 20px;line-height: 32px;margin-bottom: 8px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';"><td>What would you rather see happen?</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.oIoc9SQWKb1kr67dKCjNibonN9oBh9I8esbUho9knBo?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">The US annex Greenland</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.PuPeUEitWCcNc5yhYQ2dWIUeof7aLMPuLu7VGK25qzc?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Greenland annex the US</div></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: Explain your answer to the poll 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border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } 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padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI1MjEwMTExLjMuMDk5YzQxMTA1YTVlNWZmZkBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5ODQ0ODg4LCJ0IjoicG9kY2FzdCIsImEiOiJvbmx5X3BhaWQiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQyOTM2Njk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU1Mjg2OTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.n5EyrEfBCD9to7XIefko-lflJ_DWKRi2DKWZgiMT-dw" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (17 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGYWRhbS1raW56aW5nZXItcmlwcy10aGUtcGV0ZS1oZWdzZXRoIiwicCI6MTU5ODQ0ODg4LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MjkzNjY5NiwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1NTI4Njk2LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.Liy77I_okUaERKlPI4kMmW1qxg_y7mhycZq8E8azwQY?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.Lp1BEDHWfn26OqO8-V0yozX0SUEnaVHbu8wql9llKqE?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159844888&utm_source=podcast-email&play_audio=true&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-play-on-substack&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTg0NDg4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQyOTM2Njk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU1Mjg2OTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.P2kwe5E2XOVQj2E9zsALvGLm1IePbgJZahSPKx9LPKg&utm_content=watch_now_gif"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1138,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F127045b0-a8e7-4dc2-ab8a-fa62a1089b98_320x180.gif" alt="Adam Kinzinger.mp4" style="max-width: 550px;border: none;vertical-align: middle;width: 100%;border-radius: 12px"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;height: 16px">&nbsp;</div></td></tr><tr height="8"><td></td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><table class="fullWidth-mgXGs7" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="box-sizing: border-box;width: 100%;min-height: 40px;padding-left: 0;padding-right: 0;"><tbody><tr><td class="fullWidth-mgXGs7 emailButtonTd-o2ymya priority_primary-vWRHI0" align="center" style="box-sizing: border-box;width: 100%;min-height: 40px;padding-left: 0;padding-right: 0;border-radius: 8px;background-color: #ed1c24;"><a class="fullWidth-mgXGs7 emailButtonA-Ktpg7h" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159844888&utm_source=podcast-email&play_audio=true&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-play-on-substack&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTg0NDg4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQyOTM2Njk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU1Mjg2OTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.P2kwe5E2XOVQj2E9zsALvGLm1IePbgJZahSPKx9LPKg&utm_content=watch_now_button" style="box-sizing: border-box;width: 100%;min-height: 40px;padding-left: 0;padding-right: 0;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-size: 14px;font-weight: 600;letter-spacing: -.15px;border-radius: 8px;padding: 12px 24px;line-height: 1;text-decoration: none;display: inline-block;color: #ffffff;border: none;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_26.046511627906977,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FPlayIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D32%26fill%3D%2523ffffff%26stroke%3D%2523ffffff%26strokeWidth%3D2" width="13.023255813953488" height="16" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 13.023255813953488px" alt=""><span style="margin-left:8px;vertical-align:middle;">Watch now</span></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr height="8"><td></td></tr><tr><td><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;height: 16px">&nbsp;</div></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159844888&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTg0NDg4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQyOTM2Njk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU1Mjg2OTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.P2kwe5E2XOVQj2E9zsALvGLm1IePbgJZahSPKx9LPKg" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Adam Kinzinger Rips the Pete Hegseth Shitshow</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">The Andy Borowitz Show</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-25T21:01:28.337Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;margin-top: 0;"><span>BREAKING: Just when you thought the Trump clown show couldn&#8217;t get any clownier, Pete Hegseth goes and texts top-secret war plans to a journalist! </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/27a333bd-4958-449e-a88d-352377e41d28?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Adam Kinzinger</a><span> delivers a brutal takedown of this insanity&#8212;and offers a hilarious masterclass in trolling Trump.</span></h3><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What will Pete Hegseth text to the world next? 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI2MTEwMzE3LjMuYmI2ZjQ4YWM4YmVmODBhZEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5ODUxODEzLCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDI5ODc1ODcsImV4cCI6MTc0NTU3OTU4NywiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.6xkIbVm93mQNM4Kvtg__1eoifLLlBVoZ_2o8qjTNQ68" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The North Korean dictator called his exclusion "hurtful."</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/a6dc34fa-7c40-4d10-9148-7fb098451797?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Stung by his omission from the Trump administration&#8217;s recent war-planning chat, on Wednesday Kim Jong Un demanded to be included in all such group chats in the future.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Why was this Goldberg person, who doesn&#8217;t even have nuclear weapons, included?&#8221; the North Korean dictator asked. &#8220;This should never be allowed to happen in this country.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Kim said that he had downloaded the latest version of the Signal app and was waiting for Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth to ping him.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>Calling his exclusion from the Houthi bombing chat &#8220;hurtful,&#8221; he said, &#8220;I shouldn&#8217;t have to read about it in </span><em>The Atlantic</em><span>.&#8221;</span></p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: Who else should be included in Pete Hegseth&#8217;s group chats? 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antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://open.substack.com/pub/borowitzreport/p/adam-kinzinger-rips-the-pete-hegseth?r=pal7t&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">WATCH: Adam Kinzinger Rips the Pete Hegseth Chat Shitshow</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3d85d4d3-8111-4ea3-9849-a28f237f2624_1558x1016.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h2 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.625em;"><span>On the latest episode of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/4bd445bb-6f39-46b5-8fbb-17e4886b5a3c?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Andy Borowitz Show</a><span>, Adam Kinzinger offers a brutal takedown of the Trump clown car. Watch it </span><a href="https://open.substack.com/pub/borowitzreport/p/adam-kinzinger-rips-the-pete-hegseth?r=pal7t&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here</a><span>.</span></h2><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI2MjM0MjE0LjMuYWI4MzI1MjUwY2JiYTdhMkBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTk1MTI4OCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMDMyODExLCJleHAiOjE3NDU2MjQ4MTEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.i3gn2F_2a2Vr2UAiwpkt3s188RBKGooL8EYa4QcXcX8" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Waltz said he government&#8217;s secure communication system lacked even rudimentary emojis like fist, fire, and smiley face.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-26T23:42:24.077Z">Mar 26</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F20af8ef5-d688-42fe-8bba-cb4905402b6e_1080x720.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Alicia Christin Gerald on Unsplash</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/51eed60e-9077-453d-9cff-977a16dcb01a?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Defending his decision to use an insecure messaging app to discuss classified war plans, National Security Advisor Mike Waltz said on Wednesday that he chose Signal because it offered more emojis.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>&#8220;Those sleazebags at </span><em>The Atlantic</em><span> are acting like using Signal is some kind of scandal,&#8221; Waltz said. &#8220;You want to know a real scandal? The government spent billions of dollars on a secure communications system that has zero emojis.&#8221;</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Waltz said that he refused to use the government&#8217;s system when it became clear to him that it lacked even rudimentary emojis like fist, fire, and smiley face.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I stand by my decision to use Signal,&#8221; he said. &#8220;When you&#8217;re planning to bomb another country, an emoji is worth a thousand OMGs and LOLs.&#8221;</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" data-component-name="StaticPoll" style="border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 12px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';width: 100%;color: rgb(54,55,55);padding: 16px 16px 8px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-header" style="margin-bottom: 4px;font-size: 12px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 500;color: rgb(119,119,119);padding: 0;">POLL</td></tr><tr class="poll-question" width="100%" style="vertical-align: top;font-weight: 800;color: rgb(54,55,55);font-size: 20px;line-height: 32px;margin-bottom: 8px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';"><td>Who was the biggest moron on the WhiskeyLeaks chat?</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_dG9rZW49ZXlKMWMyVnlYMmxrSWpveU1UYzFORE00TVRjc0luQnZjM1JmYVdRaU9qRTFPVGsxTVRJNE9Dd2ljRzlzYkY5cFpDSTZNamt6T0RZNUxDSndiMnhzWDI5d2RHbHZibDlwWkNJNk1UQTROVFkzT1N3aWFXRjBJam94TnpRek1ETXlPREV4TENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRVMk1qUTRNVEVzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5c2JDMTJiM1JsSW4wLk51VzdqMHprODBuaGhfTUlPN0xDVXRnQVFYeHZrVlFpcWFxOTlKSDJicmMiLCJwIjoxNTk5NTEyODgsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQzMDMyODExLCJleHAiOjE3NDU2MjQ4MTEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.wmFtDm6kQVQ5OrnkRJiPstC6snml9_vxFUW4P6xMHGQ?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Mike Waltz</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.Vl1f7IQiQwyyhYI7c_cXyeDOBUMdsFjfIuI0Oj0RNAQ?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Pete Hegseth</div></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: Who did you vote for in the poll, and why? 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJw8kE1uwyAQRk8TdrVgAIMXnMXiZ5Ki2mDBkMg9fZUfdftm9PT0RU94q-10R-3Ekpulv-rE0AmjJJdSiYXh7vO23rBg84Rp9fS5ghXC8oV9uwWvERAkBDDJQLBKAdeBy0XNRgTDsgMOmkuYQSoQapKTD1aCBs1jCN54uCi-374Sn_oInXz8mWLdWe7rteErwVEbyJ6hqx8pY4no8I7trOWDc3JCL4sWYO2b0HmgK_joGxJhY8cIa6z7Pkqmc8Xiw4bpIx5hy9FTruUpAinNrGfWXKitPjL9XhSPtTSfGp6lbqm_AvsIqe4-l_-_hkdtxOi96ejYXj5htJJWGHZ38BcAAP__V_F9Cw"></body></html>eb4136d4-0af3-11f0-abab-0a39ee06db20Thu, 27 Mar 2025 06:11:58 GMT2025-03-27 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Greenland Rejects Trump&#8217;s Offer to Trade JD Vance for Rare Earth Minerals</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI3MTEwMjQ0LjMuODFlN2NiODlmMDIyOTQ3NUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5OTIyNzY1LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDMwNzM5MTksImV4cCI6MTc0NTY2NTkxOSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.2RgtDOWFwf_cK8JBuNtCqYUb3UWxX0Biehl13xq_x9U" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The island responded with a strongly worded rebuke.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.p7_s_A-IvP7LFyzNgwpyhsH3qsq09uLCJww7pYkE370?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fd39acd92-3684-445d-814e-febda3db06e0_594x628.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Drew Angerer/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>GREENLAND (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/d95c4226-9bb4-4228-8590-a74fd9bf37a6?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;On Thursday the government of Greenland flatly rejected Donald J. Trump&#8217;s offer to trade Vice President JD Vance for a stake in the island&#8217;s rare earth minerals.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In a strongly worded rebuke, government spokesman Hartvig Dorkelson declared, &#8220;Greenland will consider any attempt to transfer ownership of JD Vance to this island to be an act of war.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Greenland&#8217;s statement drew an impassioned response from the VP&#8217;s wife, Usha Vance, who urged the island&#8217;s government to reconsider Trump&#8217;s offer.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I strongly recommend that you agree to this deal,&#8221; she said. &#8220;We&#8217;re not even insisting on the minerals part.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Deal: Where would you like JD Vance to be sent? Leave your answer below:</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159922765&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTkyMjc2NSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMDczOTE5LCJleHAiOjE3NDU2NjU5MTksImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.mHcERkmMe5eilr8FE845Mq-whTk0La0PtWYvDV00jHY&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Leave a comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" 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data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:165,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:null,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:null,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="62.3282967032967" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f1dbda1-079b-4d5f-8b30-a5dcde4d79ef_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/cf15e62d-8a96-46dc-8060-08b38c095fc6?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">How to be Happy: Wisdom From Susie Essman</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="560" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/cf15e62d-8a96-46dc-8060-08b38c095fc6?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/bf7b82b4-10c4-432e-bf82-b29482388d9e_560x344.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:344,&quot;width&quot;:560,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:36315,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/wtf-to-be-thankful-for-an-interview?r=pal7t&amp;utm_campaign=post&amp;utm_medium=web&amp;showWelcomeOnShare=false&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/159558603?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fbf7b82b4-10c4-432e-bf82-b29482388d9e_560x344.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="337.85714285714283" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fbf7b82b4-10c4-432e-bf82-b29482388d9e_560x344.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>You know Susie Essman as the beloved comedian from </span><em>Curb Your Enthusiasm</em><span>. But did you know that she is also my favorite philosopher? </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/cf15e62d-8a96-46dc-8060-08b38c095fc6?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">I interviewed her for my show</a><span> and she had fantastic advice for finding joy amid the current nightmare. You can watch the interview </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/cf15e62d-8a96-46dc-8060-08b38c095fc6?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here</a><span>.</span></h3><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/dc2b3644-1824-4a37-abc9-636a13d0f177?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Now More Than Ever: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today.</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="848" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/de7354d6-9eb3-4a12-af33-297a8a5a0a06?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI3MTEwMjQ0LjMuODFlN2NiODlmMDIyOTQ3NUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTU5OTIyNzY1LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJib3R0b20iLCJpYXQiOjE3NDMwNzM5MTksImV4cCI6MTc0NTY2NTkxOSwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.nzOusrOQMZq2SvkvozlGYwp0Vj5401a2v07NTPXa57Q" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI3MjMwMTA3LjMuZDg2YzQwNmQ4ZTgyMzdlYUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTk5MTI4NCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTE2ODAxLCJleHAiOjE3NDU3MDg4MDEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.U553OXt4u9ut1Ggov41J0F6VrpopRPSj0J0nbwIHn3Y" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The bombshell threatens to tarnish the image of the nation&#8217;s most trusted news organization.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/deea4d38-a018-489b-9d2e-75bb4a849050_792x696.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:696,&quot;width&quot;:792,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:66832,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/159991284?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fdeea4d38-a018-489b-9d2e-75bb4a849050_792x696.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="483.3333333333333" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fdeea4d38-a018-489b-9d2e-75bb4a849050_792x696.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">John Lamparski/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/82ec94ba-630c-44a3-991e-240bdcce6703?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Millions of Americans have been rattled this week by the bombshell that a former Fox News host might be a liar, reports on Thursday indicate.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">According to industry insiders, the revelation that a former employee might have knowingly disseminated falsehoods threatens to tarnish the image of the nation&#8217;s most trusted news organization.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Harland Dorrinson, a crisis management specialist, said that Fox News needs to &#8220;change the narrative&#8221; by reminding Americans of its peerless and longstanding reputation for honesty.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Fox needs to remind people that they are the network of Bill O&#8217;Reilly, Glenn Beck, and Tucker Carlson,&#8221; he said. &#8220;One bad apple doesn&#8217;t spoil the whole bunch.&#8221;</p><table class="poll-embed poll-email" cellspacing="16px" width="100%" style="margin: 32px auto;max-width: 600px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><table class="poll-email-wrapper" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" data-component-name="StaticPoll" style="border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 12px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';width: 100%;color: rgb(54,55,55);padding: 16px 16px 8px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-header" style="margin-bottom: 4px;font-size: 12px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 500;color: rgb(119,119,119);padding: 0;">POLL</td></tr><tr class="poll-question" width="100%" style="vertical-align: top;font-weight: 800;color: rgb(54,55,55);font-size: 20px;line-height: 32px;margin-bottom: 8px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';"><td>Which of these people is the most honest?</td></tr><tr><td><table class="poll-options" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-spacing: 0 12px;"><tbody style="width: 100%;display: table;"><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.ue_HelUAfBRq44crqNb6jwVMiDm0jxAd2Mk5EQEr2kc?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">Pete Hegseth</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_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.ZngwGZGW34_FVEjdjL8yYFsxqk92BIDjLMDO3h68pRE?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">George Santos</div></a></td></tr><tr><td class="poll-option" width="100%"><a class="poll-vote-link" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL2FwaS92MS9wb2xsL3ZvdGUvZW1haWw_dG9rZW49ZXlKMWMyVnlYMmxrSWpveU1UYzFORE00TVRjc0luQnZjM1JmYVdRaU9qRTFPVGs1TVRJNE5Dd2ljRzlzYkY5cFpDSTZNamswTVRVd0xDSndiMnhzWDI5d2RHbHZibDlwWkNJNk1UQTROamMzTlN3aWFXRjBJam94TnpRek1URTJPREF4TENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRVM01EZzRNREVzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5c2JDMTJiM1JsSW4wLmxZWFBYNGE5X2VHSjJzTkZqaUV6dThMZEVqMUVjUGxrb3VmTHgtMHdISVkiLCJwIjoxNTk5OTEyODQsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTE2ODAxLCJleHAiOjE3NDU3MDg4MDEsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.2PTIQsq81urlBV0R7lG2Obygsppq8bnOqjTzm8gpsuY?" width="100%" style="text-decoration: none;color: rgb(119,119,119);width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;border: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-radius: 8px;background-color: #eee;text-align: center;padding: 10px 0;"><div class="poll-vote-contents" style="font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;width: 100%;height: 100%;display: block;font-weight: 700;color: rgb(54,55,55);">OJ Simpson</div></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: 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padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI4MTEwMzMzLjMuMTJmYWE1ZTAyZmIxZGQzZUBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTk5Mjc4OCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTYwMjk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU3NTIyOTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.42eyo14SBWzoCyf8haz4YCXPpkoD0QP-RERjlxK-xQU" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">These songs won&#8217;t be performed at the Kennedy Center any time soon.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGd2hpc2tleWxlYWtzLXRoZS1tdXNpY2FsIiwicCI6MTU5OTkyNzg4LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MzE2MDI5NiwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1NzUyMjk2LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.pEmc6WE8MOr6F5RjRGARbY-HXDw4F4IHotLAZpo-sUs?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.3p3Xq54CdKKk9iStlkT7otpSTsVTndOU9uqEwjIFgU4?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159992788&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTk5Mjc4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTYwMjk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU3NTIyOTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.J000BAzATlIdjcMwvTkYMbkIu6iIL_QdVCjPo9vpt0k" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">WhiskeyLeaks: The Musical!</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-28T11:04:45.604Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: 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style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159992788&utm_source=substack&isFreemail=true&submitLike=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTk5Mjc4OCwicmVhY3Rpb24iOiLinaQiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDMxNjAyOTYsImV4cCI6MTc0NTc1MjI5NiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTIzMzc2NTYiLCJzdWIiOiJyZWFjdGlvbiJ9.Z-vQMczEq_Qtlmht62ffcFpIn-35CHO2Qs0mJbhLwXE&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=email-reaction&r=3lipvt" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F323bf96c-e860-43b0-a9c2-bf44a81836a9_801x467.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Andrew Harnik/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">The WhiskeyLeaks scandal has been a mixed bag. On the one hand, Trump&#8217;s clown car of bozos and boozers jeopardized national security. But on the other hand, they&#8217;ve inspired some really funny songs! Here are two I recommend. Check them out&#8212;they won&#8217;t be performed at the Kennedy Center any time soon.</h3><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;">Signal Leak by Jesse Welles</h1><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/6dd73a8a-43c4-48ec-b834-f94c264ff9aa?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">I&#8217;ve previously praised Jesse Welles</a><span> as one of the artists who&#8217;s keeping me sane during Elon Musk&#8217;s presidency. </span></h3><a class="youtube-wrap" href="https://substack.com/redirect/64be12f3-6de7-4757-9f95-22f090396134?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" target="_blank" data-component-name="Youtube2ToDOMStatic" style="display: block;margin: 32px 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/youtube/w_728,c_limit/l_youtube_play_qyqt8q,w_120/_c-vn5zTDqo" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;max-width: 100%;height: auto;margin: 0 auto;display: block;width: 100%;"></a><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;">You Were Not Supposed to Message it Through by Marsh Family</h1><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">The talented Marsh Family hail from the UK but have decided to pay attention to US politics regardless. </h3><a class="youtube-wrap" href="https://substack.com/redirect/b2164012-f0b4-4ec0-a0ea-766403eb9567?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" target="_blank" data-component-name="Youtube2ToDOMStatic" style="display: block;margin: 32px 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/youtube/w_728,c_limit/l_youtube_play_qyqt8q,w_120/rPfwtXulKS4" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;max-width: 100%;height: auto;margin: 0 auto;display: block;width: 100%;"></a><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What music is helping you stay sane-ish? Leave your answer below:</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159992788&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTk5Mjc4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTYwMjk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU3NTIyOTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.J000BAzATlIdjcMwvTkYMbkIu6iIL_QdVCjPo9vpt0k&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Leave a comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI4MTEwMzMzLjMuMTJmYWE1ZTAyZmIxZGQzZUBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTk5Mjc4OCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoiYm90dG9tIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMTYwMjk2LCJleHAiOjE3NDU3NTIyOTYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.DgrkPTh9m4LeEM-wtJGElO84pUGpzlv5yVKNI5RQEx4" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" 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} @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzI5MDQwMTQwLjMuMGNlYjUzOWRhOTFiYTFlYkBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTY3MzUwOSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoib25seV9mcmVlIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MzIyMTIyNSwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1ODEzMjI1LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.JBVFtLcb66QysTz_XT5RAlScszV2lyySD2KkX8zYJ0M" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Dear Reader,</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGZnJlZS1naWZ0LWZyb20tdGJyIiwicCI6MTU5NjczNTA5LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MzIyMTIyNCwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1ODEzMjI0LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.XCrj_kRzbptpshjPvsJ6P3Cs6nDdcXBMqYQrRCi9yiQ?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.dwzuTdOXew4S9yMMxgbzgHw5DiTBMv5UcoQp1s3N_EE?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159673509&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTY3MzUwOSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMjIxMjI0LCJleHAiOjE3NDU4MTMyMjQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.UIrXi6WG0KNw7RQnsJ24brgh1QARDtG_xUjbrxLyXWY" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Free Gift from TBR!</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-29T04:03:12.554Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-29T04:03:12.554Z">Mar 29</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F69afcea1-a26b-433c-be8d-70078c8c5571_1080x746.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Ekaterina Shevchenko on Unsplash</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Dear Reader,</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">The TBR Sunday Read series &#8220;Traitor of the Week&#8221; has been our most popular feature to date. Sunday Reads are usually for paid subscribers, but as a special gift I want you to have a free sample. Hope you enjoy it! And thanks, as always, for your support.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"> &#8212;Andy</h3><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;">TBR&#8217;s Traitor of the Week</h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/996d704d-323c-466e-95f7-a1393e071b02?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines &#8220;quisling&#8221; as a traitor. The Britannica dictionary offers a somewhat more specific definition: &#8220;a person who helps an enemy that has taken control of his or her country.&#8221; </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">You&#8217;d have to be pretty heinous to have a word like that named after you, but Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator who led Norway during Hitler&#8217;s occupation, deserved it. Tried in Oslo for treason and a shitload of other crimes, he was executed in 1945. </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Norwegians might hate me for saying this, but I think it&#8217;s time to give &#8220;quisling&#8221; an update&#8212;because, right here in the United States of America, we have an embarrassment of traitors crying out for such enshrinement.</h3><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Today, I&#8217;m introducing a new TBR Sunday Read feature: Traitor of the Week. In addition to finding a replacement for &#8220;quisling&#8221; in the dictionary, I hope to provide an important public service.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">When the current fascist regime ruling the US comes to an end&#8212;as all things do&#8212;there will be tribunals in which the worst traitors will be held to account, much as Vidkun Quisling was in Oslo. Winnowing the list of Trump&#8217;s many enablers will be arduous, time-consuming work. By shining a light on the most egregious of the lot, I hope to assist whoever is ultimately assigned that daunting task. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">But first, a ground rule: a Traitor of the Week must be endowed with not just duplicitousness, but selfishness bordering on sociopathy. As the journalist Rosetta Miller Perry wrote in a 2023 opinion piece, a quisling is &#8220;someone who collaborates with an enemy occupying force for personal gain.&#8221; (FYI, Perry&#8217;s piece was entitled, &#8220;Vivek Ramasamy is the Ultimate Quisling.&#8221;) And so, as I choose candidates for Traitor of the Week, I will narrow my focus to people who are enabling this lawless regime out of ambition and/or greed&#8212;and not out of a sincere belief that what Trump is doing is good for the nation.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">For that reason, someone like Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene will not be a Traitor of the Week. You can hurl a lot of insults at Marge, but one thing you can&#8217;t say is that she&#8217;s pretending to be dumb to suck up to Trump. In October of last year, for example, she claimed that Democrats were using technology to make hurricanes hit red states. &#8220;Yes they can control the weather,&#8221; she posted on X. &#8220;It&#8217;s ridiculous for anyone to lie and say it can&#8217;t be done.&#8221; You can&#8217;t fake that kind of stupid. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">So, according to my ground rule, &#8220;greene&#8221; could never replace &#8220;quisling&#8221; in the dictionary. To make Traitor of the Week, you have to be someone who knows better&#8212;but has chosen to betray the United States anyway. </p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Over the coming weeks, I&#8217;ll be rolling out Traitors of the Week for your consideration. It would be physically debilitating to attempt to profile all of Trump&#8217;s enablers, but I will do my best to highlight the worst of the worst. Once I&#8217;ve shared a number of these candidates, I&#8217;ll invite you to vote for America&#8217;s Top Traitor.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">With that preamble over, it&#8217;s time to reveal TBR&#8217;s inaugural Traitor of the Week:</p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;">Quisling No. 1: Scott Bessent</h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/34b487f1-5bae-49fe-9a07-0e767a5c01b8?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/8a0e6cbe-6208-428b-8049-a68ddfacf896_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:56576,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F8a0e6cbe-6208-428b-8049-a68ddfacf896_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Bessent&#8217;s nomination as Treasury Secretary drew praise from many in the business community, who found his decades-long career in mainstream finance reassuring. At any rate, he wasn&#8217;t plucked off the couch at &#8220;Fox &amp; Friends.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">And he wasn&#8217;t a raving MAGA ideologue, either&#8212;he&#8217;d even had a stint working for the GOP&#8217;s most-despised liberal supervillain, George Soros. While running Soros&#8217;s London office in 1992, he made a shrewd bet against the British pound which wound up costing the UK billions and helped put a fork in the Conservative government.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">After Trump tapped Bessent, Jeffrey Sonnenfeld, president of the Yale Chief Executive Institute, called the nomination &#8220;a huge relief,&#8221; adding, "Bessent is reasonable and pragmatic.&#8221; He easily won Senate confirmation, by a vote of 68 to 29, with the support of 16 Democrats.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>Bessent sure didn&#8217;t </span><em>seem</em><span> like the kind of guy who&#8217;d then turn around and give Elon Musk&#8217;s computer-science dropouts unprecedented access to the US Treasury&#8217;s computers.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>That development sufficiently alarmed five former Treasury Secretaries&#8212;Robert Rubin, Lawrence Summers, Timothy Geithner, Jacob Lew, and Janet Yellen&#8212;to impel them to write a </span><em>New York Times</em><span> opinion piece entitled, &#8220;Our Democracy Is Under Siege.&#8221;</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Excoriating the pimply DOGE kids, they warned, &#8220;They lack training and experience to handle private, personal data&#8212;like Social Security numbers and bank account information. Their power subjects America&#8217;s payments system and the highly sensitive data within it to the risk of exposure, potentially to our adversaries. And our critical infrastructure is at risk of failure if the code that underwrites it is not handled with due care.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>The five Treasury veterans took some comfort in Bessent&#8217;s denial that Musk&#8217;s DOGE squad had done anything to actually block federal payments. But, according to the </span><em>Associated Press</em><span>, that denial was false.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Officials working with Elon Musk&#8217;s Department of Government Efficiency sought access to the U.S. Department of Treasury payment system to stop money from flowing to the U.S. Agency for International Development,&#8221; the AP reported. &#8220;DOGE&#8217;s efforts to stop USAID payments undermine assurances that the department gave to federal lawmakers in a Tuesday letter that it sought only to review the integrity of the payments and had &#8216;read-only access&#8217; to the system as part of an audit process.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">During his eventual tribunal, Bessent might want to put some distance between himself and the much-reviled Musk, but comments he has made on the record would complicate that effort. "Elon and I are completely aligned,&#8221; he told a Bloomberg podcast.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Should &#8220;bessent&#8221; be the new &#8220;quisling&#8221;? Definitely a strong contender.</p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;">Quisling No. 2: Marco Rubio</h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="774" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/542ad75d-440b-459b-b400-6678b36f748b?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/96f51f3e-a7f1-4e03-94fc-7664de1caac9_774x625.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:625,&quot;width&quot;:774,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:48652,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:true,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="444.12144702842374" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F96f51f3e-a7f1-4e03-94fc-7664de1caac9_774x625.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Mandel Ngan/AFP via Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">There was a time, not so long ago, when Marco Rubio was on the right side of history.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;As soon as I take office, I will move quickly to increase pressure on Moscow,&#8221; the then-US senator said when he was running for the 2016 GOP presidential nomination. &#8220;Under my administration, there will be no pleadings for meetings with Vladimir Putin. He will be treated for what he is&#8212;a gangster and a thug.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">He was also right about another gangster-slash-thug: Donald J. Trump.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">"He runs on this idea that he is fighting for the little guy,&#8221; he said during that campaign. &#8220;But he has spent his entire career sticking it to the little guy... If you all have friends who are thinking about voting for Donald Trump, friends do not let friends vote for con artists."</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Apparently believing that &#8220;when they go low, we go lower,&#8221; Trump said on Fox News, &#8220;I call him little Marco... he&#8217;s a very nasty guy.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">But Rubio proved that Trump wasn&#8217;t the only one who could call things little: "Have you seen his hands?&#8230; And you know what they say about men with small hands?"</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">This sort of oratory seemed unlikely to eclipse the Lincoln-Douglas debates, but when it came time to choose their nominee, GOP voters decided that they preferred Trump&#8217;s insult-comic chops to Rubio&#8217;s. Once that became clear, expediency demanded that Rubio bury the hatchet.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Putting his ambition squarely ahead of his principles, Little Marco was all too happy to toss his little hat in the ring when the twice-impeached insurrectionist with 34 felony convictions was choosing a running mate in 2024. "I think anybody who would be offered that should be honored," Rubio said.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Alas, it was not to be, as the Hillbilly Effigy, JD Vance, won the anointment instead. But Li&#8217;l Marco would have another opportunity to debase himself when Trump tapped him as Secretary of State.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Compared to the other passengers in Trump&#8217;s clown Cybertruck of a Cabinet, Rubio appeared to have something vaguely resembling gravitas. This created false hope that Li&#8217;l Marco would be that long-sought unicorn in Trumpworld: the &#8220;adult in the room.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">"Adversaries are uniting,&#8221; the hawkish-sounding Rubio told CNN. &#8220;North Korea, Iran, China, Russia [are] increasingly coordinating&#8212;it's going to require us to be very pragmatic and wise and how we invest overseas and what we do.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Comments like those offered reassurance that Rubio could put the brakes on Trump&#8217;s impulse to shred the rules-based international order and replace it with the dog-eat-dog system codified on &#8220;The Apprentice.&#8221; In one of the more remarkable displays of magical thinking by the US Senate, Rubio was confirmed unanimously.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">That was less than six weeks ago.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Since then, the United States voted against a UN resolution blaming Russia for the invasion of Ukraine, a move that aligned the US with such beacons of democracy as North Korea, Sudan, and Belarus. Rubio raised no objection when Trump blamed the invasion of Ukraine on an unlikely suspect&#8212;Ukraine&#8212;and called its president, Volodymyr Zelenskyy, a &#8220;dictator.&#8221; And after Trump and Vance disgraced the US by scolding Zelensky on live TV in the Oval Office, Rubio said this of the Ukrainian leader, who has been called the bravest head of state since Winston Churchill: &#8220;I think he should apologize for wasting our time for a meeting that was going to end the way it did.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">When Rubio is brought to justice in his tribunal, I&#8217;m confident that the jury will reach this unanimous verdict: Little Marco is a Big Traitor.</p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe 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src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJw8kNGO4yAMRb-mvG0EBsLmgW-JDLhdtAlEYKbKfP2o6aiv10dHR47I9Kjt9EftLJKfNd5tEuSVMxpAgZaCdszb-qBCDZnSivy5ggVnxT_vUgAJQRPcIaGE2VkMcdGBSAYiI7IHCVZqWKSRyshJTzJSsHpJuKiAisLNyP3xJ8mpj9AZ4_8p1l3kvt4bXQme2yDxCl1xpEwlkq9lOy_gvefklV1mp61c3gufB_lCz74RMzVxjLDGuu-jZD5XKhg2Sr_mEbYckXMtLxFo7WY7i-ZDbfWZ-ftmZKylYWp0lrqlfhX2EVLdMZcP1-iojQW_nzo6tcunnDX6r3Liy8NPAAAA__90p37w"></body></html>d4d36f5a-0c85-11f0-bcab-0a39ee06db20Sat, 29 Mar 2025 06:08:58 GMT2025-03-30 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Traitor of the Week: Special Karma Chameleon Edition!</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzMwMDQwMTUxLjMuOGJjMmE4YjFmNmM3NTVmN0BtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDA4Mjk1NywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MzMwNzYxOSwiZXhwIjoxNzQ1ODk5NjE5LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.4kawXvw3434--Xmcr5B6KY_sG0xw5xEOEo5sC2A0J6s" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">TBR Sunday Read</div><div class="preview" 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" 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#777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">TBR Sunday Read</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-30T04:03:12.211Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-30T04:03:12.211Z">Mar 30</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/c4de2a14-d1b9-44fe-aca1-1158309c957e?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Welcome to the sixth installment of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/e300c360-310f-4bf4-9e49-b72f3276892e?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Traitor of the Week</a><span>&#8212;TBR&#8217;s most popular series ever!</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">In this series I profile the most egregious enablers of the fascist regime presently vandalizing the US&#8212;and ask you, the reader, to choose the worst.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">An inspiration for this series is Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator in Norway whose villainy was so epic that his last name has become a synonym for traitor.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">This week&#8217;s quisling is a very special one. </h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;margin-bottom: 0;">Most traitors in this series won&#8217;t be punished until their tribunals, but this loathsome chameleon just suffered a karmic&#8212;and possibly career-ending&#8212;comeuppance. It&#8217;s been a delicious spectacle to witness: ...</h3></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: rgb(255,255,255);color: rgb(54,55,55);border-top: solid 2px #ed1c24;margin-top: 6px;"><h2 class="paywall-title" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: 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padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; 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padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzMxMDA0NjUwLjMuNjFjNDAzZDY3NTFkZTYzMEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDIyMjk5NSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMzgyMjE1LCJleHAiOjE3NDU5NzQyMTUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.SuFBGF4Ljvxdxz6n4S92m_ip60oSKbFIaSCrZLFxWP4" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Poll respondents favor exploring &#8220;all possible avenues&#8221; to enable Trump to serve such a term.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 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more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.uGTzOf4xniZzoEfNmBVPC028WzbmsJ7wHoa4PtZO_U0?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160222995&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDIyMjk5NSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMzgyMjEzLCJleHAiOjE3NDU5NzQyMTMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.GXnMuQris9_KQrgAk5VTdxAWudVgWGt5PQYOG-ad3OI" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Support Grows for Trump Serving Third Term in Prison</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-03-31T00:46:58.138Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-03-31T00:46:58.138Z">Mar 31</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fbc84ccf6-0935-4353-b99c-7b96d31f1317_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Brendan McDermid-Pool/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/6091f3ce-dc37-4453-ae7e-8ace8c2af2ea?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Support is growing for the notion of Donald J. Trump serving a third term in prison, a new poll released on Sunday indicates.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The poll, conducted by the Opinion Research Institute at the University of Minnesota, reveals that many Americans would like to see Trump serve such a third term even before his second term in the White House is over.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Davis Logsdon, who supervised the survey, said that poll respondents favor exploring &#8220;any way to make this happen,&#8221; including &#8220;a constitutional amendment permitting him to serve several such terms.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_270,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%402x.png" srcset="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_135,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button.png, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_270,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%402x.png 2x, https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_405,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Fimg%2Femail%2Fpublish-button%403x.png 3x" width="135" alt="Start writing" height="40" style="max-width: 550px;border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;"></a></p></div></div></td><td></td></tr></tbody></table><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzMxMDA0NjUwLjMuNjFjNDAzZDY3NTFkZTYzMEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDIyMjk5NSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoiYm90dG9tIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzMzgyMjE1LCJleHAiOjE3NDU5NzQyMTUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.nD_17GjNaP7zhG43aSFUqNpxp3rcpGNC-484dlRPezY" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" src="https://email.mg-d0.substack.com/o/eJxEkEuO8yAQBk8Tdr_FG3vBWSygO_nR2GBBk8hz-lEemtlWt0qlLwXCW22nP2onBt6qcDXA0AunlZqlFDPDPeRtvWHBFghhDfR3NVIv7L9Ho5SwUUR0KuJsrgbnAJAwODcvkrPsJZeGKyU419bwSU1WJM0VWGcEoFX8ovl--wd86iN2CulrSnVnua_Xhq8ET20ge4auYUDGktDjHdtZywdn8MJyKeWymDeh80Bf8NE3JMLGjhHXVPd9lEzniiXEDeEjHnHLKVCu5SmSSjlrLGs-1lYfmb4vmqdaWoCGZ6kb9FdgHxHqHnL5_Wt41EaM3puOju3lE85oNQvH7l7-BAAA___qr315"></body></html>e43183c8-0e52-11f0-b09e-0a39ee06db20Mon, 31 Mar 2025 13:09:22 GMT2025-03-31 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Vance Caught Trying to Steal All of Greenland&#8217;s Minerals in his Parka</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwMzMxMTY1NjMzLjMuN2FmY2JmZjc5YjE1YjczMkBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDE4MTk5MywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNDQwNDIyLCJleHAiOjE3NDYwMzI0MjIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.dpKpzuQBhgpix5f1wLbwRRIOZhaml8vIYxuong7LWQc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The island&#8217;s precious reserves came tumbling out 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class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/29ac8b39-eecb-442c-911e-2ef41c7cce36?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;The government of Greenland revealed on Monday that it had arrested JD Vance last week after he attempted to abscond with all of the island&#8217;s rare earth minerals hidden inside his parka.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">As he walked up the stairs to Air Force Two to return to the US last Friday, metric tons of lithium, niobium, hafnium, and zirconium came tumbling from his bulky outer garment.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Greenlandic law enforcement immediately nabbed the vice president and shipped him to Denmark, where he will stand trial for grand larceny.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In Washington, Elon Musk said that instead of replacing Vance he would eliminate his position.</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What else could JD hide inside that parka?</h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDAxMTEwMzM2LjMuZjQyN2MwODlmMDcxNjQ2OEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTYwMjgzMzk0LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDM1MDU4ODAsImV4cCI6MTc0NjA5Nzg4MCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.MU02EiMsR5wnIO1E_KDiHMCFJHqpOdnWDVET09PX7wA" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;The pressure on us has been unbearable," the blood vessels said.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/04ff5db6-3328-47fd-a885-4f46c3f21b70?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;The arteries of Donald J. Trump are &#8220;extremely unlikely&#8221; to serve a third term in the White House, the blood vessels said on Tuesday.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In a social media post, the vascular tubes pushed back against Trump&#8217;s recent musings about remaining in office beyond his second term.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Leaving aside the constitutional issues, there are serious anatomical issues,&#8221; the arteries said. &#8220;The pressure on us has been unbearable.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">At the White House, Trump slammed his arteries&#8217; comments, telling reporters, &#8220;My circulatory system has treated me very unfairly.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro 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.typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDAxMjIwNjQ3LjMuNjY1ZjI3ZDViNDczM2JkZEBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDM3MzQ4NCwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MzU0NTUxMCwiZXhwIjoxNzQ2MTM3NTEwLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.oPUYmaMnJ1Siekv_CQN-oWzD5pXBbr1Nhc1Zr3OiZCs" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (47 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div 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Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160373484&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDM3MzQ4NCwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNTQ1NTEwLCJleHAiOjE3NDYxMzc1MTAsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.XY0tfmqhojXqQBCnSmcB21X1TBM7MTNtQ7w29GCA2rc" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Republicans Are Scared Shitless</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">The Andy Borowitz Show</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-01T22:07:00.297Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDAyMTEzMTI2LjMuMjAzMDFjOGExNjZhMWVhZEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTYwNDA5OTAyLCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDM1OTM3NjcsImV4cCI6MTc0NjE4NTc2NywiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.plQAeaZR_p05-iQOybxdveqYNmJgNgsB4NSNVUhcMaI" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;I want $20 million wired into my account by end of business Wednesday,&#8221; the furious South African declared.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160409902&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDQwOTkwMiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNTkzNzY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDYxODU3NjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.hHlISDO5EBWcUThauj_Osmz_nO78KVm5nLVnjF-0K8E" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Furious Elon Musk Demands Refund from Wisconsin</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-02T11:31:50.424Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/3a3e756a-8857-4816-bf9a-7816837e0289?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/2e159c83-21c5-4688-8f9a-82fc9de64677_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:55254,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160409902?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2e159c83-21c5-4688-8f9a-82fc9de64677_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F2e159c83-21c5-4688-8f9a-82fc9de64677_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Theo Wargo/WireImage</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/65dc3b9e-ea85-46c8-b6b9-1ab3fe44ae97?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;After being handed a bruising defeat in the state&#8217;s Supreme Court election on Tuesday, Elon Musk angrily demanded that Wisconsin pay him back &#8220;in full&#8221; for the money he poured into the contest.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I want $20 million wired into my account by end of business Wednesday,&#8221; the furious South African declared. &#8220;And I want it all in cash, none of that worthless crypto shit.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Until I am refunded, every voter I bribed is my employee,&#8221; he continued. &#8220;As such, I forbid you to work remotely and demand that you report to Tesla headquarters at once.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In a final demand, Musk said he expected to be reimbursed $16.95 for the cost of his cheesehead.</p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/d5ef21a4-d814-4dce-b1bf-d8c1b01332c2?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Thanks to Wisconsin, the Republicans Are Shitting Themselves</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/d5ef21a4-d814-4dce-b1bf-d8c1b01332c2?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:106217,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/republicans-are-scared-shitless&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160409902?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>For saying &#8220;fuck you&#8221; to Nazis, Wisconsin has become the Greenland of the Midwest. They&#8217;ve sent the Republicans into a spiraling panic attack, which I break down </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/d5ef21a4-d814-4dce-b1bf-d8c1b01332c2?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here.</a></h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/999a1f61-785e-4450-835f-4920fb15bc46?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/5b87a912-619d-4f86-9fe7-d41d3b8cda9d_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:165,&quot;width&quot;:1456,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:5092,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/png&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160181993?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5b87a912-619d-4f86-9fe7-d41d3b8cda9d_2200x250.png&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="62.3282967032967" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5b87a912-619d-4f86-9fe7-d41d3b8cda9d_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/5ab215f1-31e1-457a-a2a5-2b357582fb78?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Now More Than Ever: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today.</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="848" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/225d1b11-3fc5-453c-9807-772d210fc8cf?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" 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src="https://email.mg2.substack.com/o/eJw8kEvO5CAMBk_zs4x4OJAsOEtkwN2DJoEITLcypx_1Q_-2bJVKX0Sme22XP2tnkTwktcyLIK8cmHkF40DQgXnf7lSoIVPakL9X46xblBZ_vEaHGrQxZEC5gKBlCOQgQrqta7Aiey31LEFqpYzSdjKTlkaquKCyFhVh-gF53PXUR-iM8e8U6yFy326N3gGe2yDxytxwpEwlkqcHtauWL87JKytBrqvUH8LXSb7Qs-_ETE2cI2yxHscoma-NCoad0lc8wp4jcq7lJdLGODtb0XyorT4z__sBGWtpmBpdpe6pvwP7CKkemMvvX6OzNhb8WXR0am-fcjOYRTnx8Pp_AAAA__9xK3x4"></body></html> fbd5aa98-0fcb-11f0-9738-0a39ee06db20Wed, 02 Apr 2025 10:08:42 GMT2025-04-03 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Democratic Candidates Beg Musk to Visit Their States</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDAyMjMwMDUyLjMuODllOTQ3NjhiMzM4OTUwM0BtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDQ0MDcyNSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNjM1MTc2LCJleHAiOjE3NDYyMjcxNzYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.DYHi1iiLQHzvbKHkl8L1x8lvVUpLnaByusEK-BwYBS0" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Banking on a miracle that only the South African businessman can deliver.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/a6019c0b-29a1-489b-ac9e-7b7750570e99_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:71310,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160440725?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa6019c0b-29a1-489b-ac9e-7b7750570e99_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa6019c0b-29a1-489b-ac9e-7b7750570e99_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Scott Olson/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/76a3a0f4-1273-4257-af54-6d6ba69032a5?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;A mad scramble erupted on Wednesday as hundreds of Democratic candidates across the nation begged Elon Musk to visit their states.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Democrats who previously thought their electoral prospects were dim pleaded with the South African businessman for a miracle that only his noxious presence can deliver.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Additionally, they implored Musk to don stereotypical regional headwear during his visit in the hopes of striking the most off-putting note possible.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;No one guarantees a Democratic victory like Elon Musk,&#8221; one party strategist said. &#8220;He fell apart in Wisconsin like a human Cybertruck.&#8221;</p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/8b4aa13f-abe6-4c59-a873-b8e0c4008381?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Thanks to Wisconsin, the Republicans Are Shitting Themselves</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/8b4aa13f-abe6-4c59-a873-b8e0c4008381?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:106217,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/republicans-are-scared-shitless&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160409902?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F14db52bc-ffb0-40f9-8f36-d1c17d21e289_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>For saying &#8220;fuck you&#8221; to Nazis, Wisconsin has become the Greenland of the Midwest. They&#8217;ve sent the Republicans into a spiraling panic attack, which I break down </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/8b4aa13f-abe6-4c59-a873-b8e0c4008381?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here.</a><span> </span></h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/74190cc7-c4a5-4bea-96a2-5733d0cf3d36?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5b87a912-619d-4f86-9fe7-d41d3b8cda9d_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: 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.markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, .typography .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four, .typography.editor .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img, .typography.editor .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description, .typography.editor .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup .apple-podcast-container, .typography.editor .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDAzMTYzMjE4LjMuOWVmOGQ0MjRiM2QzNWFiZUBtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDQwODk1MywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNjk4MTY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDYyOTAxNjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.FNmwCh28Bvz3s-CqdWt0BJtWv0AJ6mcgpDJhFTjIL9E" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">A call to action.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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Now it's our turn.</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-03T16:32:26.163Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F3f7b7457-ffce-4a81-9291-257129e18cdb_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Win McNamee/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Cory Booker made history this week at the US Senate.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Now it&#8217;s our turn&#8212;across the USA.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>This Saturday, April 5, is a national day of action. </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/02143b86-22cc-463a-999e-0377672df92a?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Hands Off!</a><span> protests against the fascist Trump/Musk regime will take place from coast to coast.</span></h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="878" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/78fd940b-17d6-4988-a2e1-253250fb654d?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/a8c86b55-8f5c-40cb-964b-72b843414e08_878x504.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:504,&quot;width&quot;:878,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:31689,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://handsoff2025.com&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:false,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160408953?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa8c86b55-8f5c-40cb-964b-72b843414e08_878x504.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="315.7175398633257" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa8c86b55-8f5c-40cb-964b-72b843414e08_878x504.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>For information about the protest nearest you and other ways to take action, click </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/02143b86-22cc-463a-999e-0377672df92a?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">here</a><span>.</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">If you&#8217;re not able to protest, please share this post with everyone you know. </h3><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160408953&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&utm_campaign=email-share&action=share&triggerShare=true&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDQwODk1MywiaWF0IjoxNzQzNjk4MTY2LCJleHAiOjE3NDYyOTAxNjYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.GxYDZWHgeuOm_aATfRaSK9yEG5yFk1qjxIAS8hDix9U&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" 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antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Love,</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Andy</h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/171ba9d4-e346-4bb6-823a-b1dcd7e0ea29?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5b87a912-619d-4f86-9fe7-d41d3b8cda9d_2200x250.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table></figure></div><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/541f0f4a-73c5-425c-8784-ac0727be2a36?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Join the Resistance: Subscribe to The Borowitz Report Today.</a></h1><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="848" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/f6562474-f735-41ed-b4d3-7f9eb6d54097?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA0MTkzNTMxLjMuNmUxZWVmMGE0NmUwNTkyNkBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDU4NjQ2MSwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0Mzc5NTU1NCwiZXhwIjoxNzQ2Mzg3NTU0LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.X9mo3V9XOpZysprpwhNo7Ns1-JNDr4q2H5wW8utJVPg" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (12 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" 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32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.p_FwO5hkbWvYMi4I_oyzjzmnWE-FcML88xjgFR8ebFw?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160586461&utm_source=podcast-email&play_audio=true&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-play-on-substack&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDU4NjQ2MSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNzk1NTU0LCJleHAiOjE3NDYzODc1NTQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.PZaDRYiChVbhn9wJejP23BvDIQdnZtMhcWMZsDhMVRk&utm_content=watch_now_gif"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1138,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F7e7df7ff-a1a0-46fb-83ea-cf05eefc5d67_320x180.gif" alt="Wikler.mp4" style="max-width: 550px;border: none;vertical-align: middle;width: 100%;border-radius: 12px"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;height: 16px">&nbsp;</div></td></tr><tr height="8"><td></td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><table class="fullWidth-mgXGs7" role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="box-sizing: border-box;width: 100%;min-height: 40px;padding-left: 0;padding-right: 0;"><tbody><tr><td class="fullWidth-mgXGs7 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Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160586461&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDU4NjQ2MSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzNzk1NTU0LCJleHAiOjE3NDYzODc1NTQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.PZaDRYiChVbhn9wJejP23BvDIQdnZtMhcWMZsDhMVRk" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Wisconsin Blowout Special! </a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">The Andy Borowitz Show </h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-04T19:35:38.365Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 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A conversation guaranteed to increase your happiness&#8212;do not miss it! </span></h3><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/f990f9ae-e2f3-46a8-aa2e-67d30f28d04b?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;"><img class="wide-image" 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body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA2MDQwMTUxLjMuNzc2MzFmYjMzZWI5NTQxY0BtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE1OTY4MDYyOSwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0MzkxMjQ2MCwiZXhwIjoxNzQ2NTA0NDYwLCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.1ris3V_JPAD7_lyJF2ctokN_kLU9YFvKoYA12VylbSc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">TBR Sunday Read</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; 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style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGdHJhaXRvci1vZi10aGUtd2Vlay1xdWlzbGluZy1uby02IiwicCI6MTU5NjgwNjI5LCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJmIjp0cnVlLCJ1IjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsImlhdCI6MTc0MzkxMjQ1OSwiZXhwIjoxNzQ2NTA0NDU5LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImxpbmstcmVkaXJlY3QifQ.-b0oIZdHskqem4RfPxpFKFLiRSndYQIg9kZlNcUR6V8?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.kRTNnEeNtjHmyBHEdYxvWg7AvCe8WBThEf0AdiPrRB0?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=159680629&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE1OTY4MDYyOSwiaWF0IjoxNzQzOTEyNDU5LCJleHAiOjE3NDY1MDQ0NTksImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.6E6L17TJsAxV63xq-EdZUn3GBk3p1MAi9-04WeSaByM" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Traitor of the Week: Quisling No. 7</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">TBR Sunday Read</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item audience-lock" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;padding-right: 9px;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_28,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLockFullIcon%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D28%26strokeWidth%3D3.6" width="14" height="14" style="border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-left: -4px;margin-top: -3px;max-width: 14px" alt=""></td><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-06T04:03:20.438Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-04-06T04:03:20.438Z">Apr 6</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><table role="presentation" width="38" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="center"><a class="email-icon-button" 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="692" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/f0f8c13f-9b4e-4fe9-9f9c-303db20baa94?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/e19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:637,&quot;width&quot;:692,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:43045,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:null,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" title="" width="550" height="506.28612716763007" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fe19062d7-89c4-4116-85bc-b656a8e63d19_692x637.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Vidkun Quisling (1887-1945), who headed Norway&#8217;s government and collaborated with the Nazis during his nation&#8217;s occupation. Shown here at his trial in Oslo, he was convicted and executed. (Fox Photos/Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;"><span>Welcome to the seventh installment of </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/9ba09e5a-b3d1-457e-b584-ec584cb761af?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Traitor of the Week</a><span>&#8212;TBR&#8217;s most popular series ever!</span></h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">In this series I profile the most egregious enablers of the fascist regime presently vandalizing the US&#8212;and ask you, the reader, to choose the worst.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">An inspiration for this series is Vidkun Quisling, the Nazi collaborator in Norway whose villainy was so epic that his last name has become a synonym for traitor.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">With apologies to Norwegians, I think the word &#8220;quisling&#8221; is ripe for an update, since the US currently has an embarrassment of traitors worthy of such enshrinement.</h3><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Each week, I highlight those who, for personal gain, are aiding and abetting the criminal cabal operating out of the White House. After I have profiled a number of Traitors of the Week, I&#8217;ll ask TBR readers to vote for America&#8217;s Top Traitor.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;margin-bottom: 0;">This week&#8217;s traitor is a relative newcomer to the Trump Crime Syndicate, but he&#8217;s already zoomed to the top of my leaderboard as one of the most odious quislings going. Let&#8217;s see if you agree:...</p></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: rgb(255,255,255);color: rgb(54,55,55);border-top: solid 2px #ed1c24;margin-top: 6px;"><h2 class="paywall-title" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: 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} @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA2MjEzMDUyLjMuODQzYTc4OTYyY2M1MTRlMUBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDcxMjIxNywidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQzOTc1MjY4LCJleHAiOjE3NDY1NjcyNjgsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.IpWb-vAk2kNjGwvfxNOdMhdOTA4_4qXEGQQdW-tPxpU" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The corporate media got it wrong--again.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.6mSEQhcXHRzvfgyBxdpc6x67g-eeZRr5ez_Ws52d10Y?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none 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href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160712217&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDcxMjIxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQzOTc1MjY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDY1NjcyNjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.8chk__1pjcYic4UmxQnHeUULnJ0oYJYhjduLL14PXWc" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">WE WON</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-06T21:31:01.337Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-04-06T21:31:01.337Z">Apr 6</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr><tr><td><table role="presentation" width="100%" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_36,c_scale,f_png,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack.com%2Ficon%2FLucideArrowUpRight%3Fv%3D4%26height%3D36%26fill%3Dnone%26stroke%3D%2523808080%26strokeWidth%3D2" width="18" height="18" style="min-width: 18px;min-height: 18px;border: none;vertical-align: middle;margin-right: 0;margin-left: 0;max-width: 18px" alt=""></a></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr><tr height="16"><td height="16" style="font-size:0px;line-height:0;">&nbsp;</td></tr></tbody></table></div></div><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="body markup" dir="auto" style="text-align: initial;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;width: 100%;word-break: break-word;margin-bottom: 16px;font-family: 'SF Pro Display', -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, 'Inter', 'Segoe UI', Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, 'Apple Color Emoji', 'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;margin-top: 0;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1024" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" href="https://substack.com/redirect/c18c1fc3-b25c-4a53-affa-4cb0d5f36f22?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" style="position: relative;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;padding: 0;width: auto;height: auto;border: none;text-decoration: none;display: block;margin: 0;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><img class="wide-image" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/c63af5d3-8a8c-46f2-b259-f0ae6df06528_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:683,&quot;width&quot;:1024,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:186230,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/heic&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:null,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://www.borowitzreport.com/i/160712217?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fc63af5d3-8a8c-46f2-b259-f0ae6df06528_1024x683.heic&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false}" alt="" width="550" height="366.845703125" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fc63af5d3-8a8c-46f2-b259-f0ae6df06528_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">I approve this message: a massive Hands Off! protest in St. Paul, Minnesota. (Christopher Mark Juhn/Anadolu via Getty Images)</figcaption></figure></div><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">The corporate media said that the American people support Trump&#8217;s extremist agenda&#8230;</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">&#8230;and that Democrats are in disarray&#8230;</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">&#8230;and that there is no resistance.</h3><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;">Last week proved the corporate media wrong&#8212;about everything.</h3><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">For 25 hours, Senator Cory Booker eviscerated Trump from the floor of the US Senate, winning worldwide acclaim.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">In two special elections in Florida, Republicans wildly underperformed Trump&#8217;s 2024 results, while his own poll numbers plummeted to new lows.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">In Wisconsin, a fired-up Democratic Party produced historic turnout and a blowout victory, hurtling ketamine freak Elon Musk into political oblivion.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">On Wall Street, investors turned on Trump ferociously after his disastrous &#8220;Liberation Day&#8221; display of economic idiocy.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">And on Saturday, people around the world&#8212;including many of you&#8212;made history by hitting the streets for massive anti-Trump protests.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Thousands of TBR community members joined me for a live chat over the weekend. (We did not discuss Houthi bombing targets.) Here are some of their inspiring comments about the Hands Off! protests they attended. </h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">I couldn&#8217;t be prouder to be a part of this community&#8212;and this movement&#8212;with you.</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Love,</h4><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Andy</h4><div class="subscribe-widget is-signed-up" data-component-name="SubscribeWidget" style="margin: 0 0 1em;direction: ltr;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset button-wrapper" style="text-decoration: unset;list-style: none;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button subscribe-btn primary" href="https://substack.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.aeQqhBNEQ9CRg_bDoegF6DWjIfuC7CK5c33SVhjU2y8?&utm_medium=email&utm_source=subscribe-widget&utm_content=160712217" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';display: inline-block;box-sizing: border-box;cursor: pointer;border: none;border-radius: 8px;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 600;text-align: center;opacity: 1;outline: none;white-space: nowrap;text-decoration: none !important;margin: 0 auto;background-color: #ed1c24;color: #ffffff !important;padding: 12px 20px;height: auto;"><span style="color: #ffffff;text-decoration: none;">Upgrade to paid</span></a></div></div><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">We had a great crowd in Baltimore at City Hall. Senator Van Hollen was the first speaker. Local politicians spoke. The funniest one was our local introvert, who starts out, &#8220;I am an introvert! I don&#8217;t want to be here! I&#8217;d rather be on the couch watching Golden Girls! But I HAVE to do this!&#8221; &#8211;Pamela</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Thousands of people in Portland, Oregon shut down major streets and several bridges. Fabulous energy, excellent signs, and yes, a real sense that we are not doing this alone. &#8211;Debra</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">White River Junction VT - people from babies to 80+ year old veterans of the anti Vietnam Resistance lined the streets with home made signs. 98% of the passing cars honked &amp; waved in support. The organizers expected 50 people, 760 signed up &amp; 1500 showed up. As a vet of both anti-Vietnam civil disobedience and Act Up demos during the AIDS crisis, I had made &amp; gave away bumper stickers saying "Silence = Death of Democracy." People loved them. &#8211;Heather</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Cory Booker&#8217;s heroic Senate stand transfused us with energy and hope beforehand. Many from Martha&#8217;s Vineyard traveled to Boston. For those who couldn&#8217;t we had an unusually huge gathering at 5 Corners, our traditional protest site, and we kept it going with speeches, music, appreciation of many clever signs and a great deal of enthusiasm at being with likeminded folks and a number of well-behaved dogs. And we&#8217;re just getting started! &#8211;Binnie</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">In Hendersonville, NC, a town of 15,000 residents, 1500 people showed up for the Hands Off! resist, Insist, Persist rally. The city blocked off a section of Main Street for this peaceful rally promoting racial equality, LGBTQ+ rights, land conservation, immigration protection, Helene rebuilding efforts and more. &#8211;Bill</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">There must have been 500,000 along 26 blocks on 5th Avenue. Started with a local rally in Mont Kisco, NY and took a standing room only Metro North train and marched from Bryant Park to Madison Square Park. &#8211;Francesca</p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">There were around 1000 of all ages in Fort Wayne IN in spite of the chilly weather and drizzle. Very friendly and talkative crowd. The courthouse plaza was packed as was nearby streets. Signs were fantastic! Lots of honking vehicles. The best was the Amazon truck honking non-stop and the driver waving in support! I felt hopeful. &#8212;Carolynne </p><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><hr style="margin: 32px 0;padding: 0;height: 1px;background: #e6e6e6;border: none;"></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Redondo Beach, CA. (Look it up, Patti Smith did a great song entitled "Redondo Beach") The weather here yesterday was crappy at noon; only about 75 degrees, light wind, sunny. One would expect that under those conditions that there would be many concerned citizens at the nice park by the beach and pier. Well, we never saw any evidence of that, because. . . . an hour before the event, we couldn't find any available parking, even with my handicapped sticker. Apparently the event was packed, with my kind of people. So we will wait until next weekend and get to the next event earlier. I was only a kid in the 60s and early 70s and wasn't allowed to go to any protests then, although I was on the McGovern for President club as a high school soph in 1972. LEAD US FORWARD, ANDY!!! &#8211;Paul</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">Share your stories from the protest you attended: </h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160712217&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDcxMjIxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQzOTc1MjY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDY1NjcyNjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.8chk__1pjcYic4UmxQnHeUULnJ0oYJYhjduLL14PXWc&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Leave a comment&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;text-align: center;cursor: pointer;border-radius: 4px;"><a class="button primary" rel="" href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160712217&utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&isFreemail=true&comments=true&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDcxMjIxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQzOTc1MjY3LCJleHAiOjE3NDY1NjcyNjcsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.8chk__1pjcYic4UmxQnHeUULnJ0oYJYhjduLL14PXWc&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-half-magic-comments&action=post-comment" style="font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';display: inline-block;box-sizing: border-box;cursor: pointer;border: none;border-radius: 8px;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 600;text-align: center;margin: 0;opacity: 1;outline: none;white-space: nowrap;color: #ffffff !important;text-decoration: none !important;background-color: #ed1c24;padding: 12px 20px;height: auto;"><span style="color: #ffffff;text-decoration: none;">Leave a comment</span></a></p><h1 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 2em;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/b76343e3-3daf-481e-9340-f7d345da62f8?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Join the Community. 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA3MTEwMzQyLjMuMDJmODZlZTczZmM2Y2I1NEBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTYwNzEzODM5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDQwMjQzNDIsImV4cCI6MTc0NjYxNjM0MiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.xADGdtkCFI2liVFaJVAoCPYKJqyd_4rXW9EkHGa-Hgc" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">"Investors are in a bad mood is because they are not getting enough Omega-3 fatty acids,&#8221; he said.&nbsp;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 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more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.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.kdraijhqV4X7QozMCusRFx1KvLaZT_lRXtq0IV4ccSA?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><div class="post typography" dir="auto" style="padding: 32px 0 0 0;font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><div class="post-header" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;"><h1 class="post-title published" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160713839&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDcxMzgzOSwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MDI0MzQyLCJleHAiOjE3NDY2MTYzNDIsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.w9hm2hPEUer2iI5czLB1e9LTf9QS5IfQIjSH-YbQ_sY" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">RFK Jr. Says Stock Market Crash Could be Reversed if Investors Drink Cod Liver Oil</a></h1><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-07T11:05:07.647Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-04-07T11:05:07.647Z">Apr 7</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/1a6f3063-9d19-4148-aa1e-6796b0dbc6f4?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Offering a remedy to last week&#8217;s devastating crash on global stock markets, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. said on Monday that the plummeting trend could be reversed if investors would drink high doses of cod liver oil. </span><br><br><span>&#8220;Stocks are crashing because investors are in a bad mood, and the reason they are in a bad mood is because they are not getting enough Omega-3 fatty acids,&#8221; he said. &#8220;This is what caused the Great Depression.&#8221;</span><br><br><span>Bolstering the credibility of his suggestion, he added, &#8220;Dr. Oz is with me on this.&#8221;</span><br><br><span>Kennedy&#8217;s prescription, however, was met with skepticism from financial experts, who noted that tariffs on cod liver oil had made the liquid virtually unaffordable.</span></p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe 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src="https://email.mg2.substack.com/o/eJxEkEmu5CAMQE9TLCMGB8iCs0QMTjXqBCIwVUqfvlWD_t8-209Pjp7wXtvlztqJJQdJ2NkydMIAcAkKNMPD5329Y8HmCdPq6XcqLSzsj4sb6BR0DHMUnOMicMM5WGPMAh6SZdlJLmcO3AjBFchJTVxuViMatcXXIdyAH3c59RE6-fh3ivVgua9bw3eAozaQvTJXP1LGEtHhA9tVyxfn5ITmRiirlg-h60RX8Nl3JMLGzhHWWI9jlEzXisWHHdNXPMKeo6dcy0sklTJ61qy5UFt9Zvp3Ax5raT41vErdU38H9hFSPXwuP3sNz9qI0eejo2N7-4SZQVlh2MPJ_wEAAP__N599Lw"></body></html>4bd05e62-13b9-11f0-ba67-0a39ee06db20Mon, 07 Apr 2025 10:05:01 GMT2025-04-08 Borowitz Report<html style="scrollbar-width: thin;scrollbar-color: #dbdbdbrgb(255,255,255);"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><title>Today, These Americans Stood up to Trump</title><style> @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { .typography .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.image-wrapper img, .typography .markup table.kindle-wrapper img, .typography.editor .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA4MDA0NTI3LjMuMDA4NjhiNzg5ZTg1ZTBhM0BtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDgyNjI4OCwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MDczMzc2LCJleHAiOjE3NDY2NjUzNzYsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.SNF3faRH-TV9dVA8YGSRft-hGy4O7IxnuBz_8NiwTmQ" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (11 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160826288&utm_source=podcast-email&play_audio=true&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-play-on-substack&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDgyNjI4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MDczMzc1LCJleHAiOjE3NDY2NjUzNzUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.kvZQypP068fpKiDyYOTiIUwUC9A0STBNmOtP87Z7Jsw&utm_content=watch_now_gif"><img 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Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160826288&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDgyNjI4OCwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MDczMzc1LCJleHAiOjE3NDY2NjUzNzUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.kvZQypP068fpKiDyYOTiIUwUC9A0STBNmOtP87Z7Jsw" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">Today, These Americans Stood up to Trump</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: normal;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 4px 0 0;color: #777777;line-height: 24px;font-size: 18px;margin-top: 12px;">The Andy Borowitz Show</h3><table class="post-meta custom" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="margin: 1em 0;height: 20px;align-items: center;"><tbody><tr><td class="post-meta-item post-date" title="2025-04-08T00:45:38.911Z" style="position: relative;padding: 0px 12px 0px 0;height: 14px;font-size: 14px;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';color: #777777;text-decoration: none;margin-right: 0;padding-right: 0;white-space: nowrap;font-weight: 400;padding-top: 0;padding-bottom: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset color-secondary-ls1g8s line-height-20-t4M0El font-meta-MWBumP size-11-NuY2Zx weight-medium-fw81nC transform-uppercase-yKDgcq reset-IxiVJZ meta-EgzBVA" style="list-style: none;font-size: 11px;line-height: 20px;text-decoration: unset;color: rgb(119,119,119);margin: 0;font-family: 'SF Compact',-apple-system,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 500;text-transform: uppercase;letter-spacing: .2px;"><time datetime="2025-04-08T00:45:38.911Z">Apr 8</time></div></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="email-ufi-2-top" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="border-top: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);border-bottom: 1px solid rgb(0,0,0,.1);min-width: 100%;"><tbody><tr height="16"><td height="16" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA4MTU0MjQ5LjMuM2Y0YjA5OGM4MTVmMGM4MkBtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDY1Mjk1MCwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MTI3MTY5LCJleHAiOjE3NDY3MTkxNjksImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.xAidKh6CGOnkAlwdE203Pmlq3Wxk4HrmF-vzWc1fx-Q" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The price of his go-to beauty product has quadrupled.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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href="https://substack.com/redirect/4278b906-4bf6-47e4-988d-408c6929b458?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In the latest illustration of the tensions roiling the White House, on Tuesday JD Vance reportedly &#8220;blew his stack&#8221; when he learned that newly instituted tariffs had sent the price of his favorite eyeliner brand soaring.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">According to sources, Vance demanded a meeting with Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick upon discovering that the price of his go-to beauty product, Shanghai Smokeshow, had quadrupled.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">The meeting, however, did not achieve its desired result, as a tearful Vance emerged from it with black streaks staining his cheeks.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 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.install-substack-app-embed-link, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA5MTEwNDA4LjMuZDhhYTQwYTRiZmJiOGQ3Y0BtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDg4MTcwMiwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoidG9wIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MTk3Mjk1LCJleHAiOjE3NDY3ODkyOTUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.CqN82NRMMhQvYG6EJg7TDaWAk6_nMDsyH95I3y8j_ic" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">The fired staffer used &#8220;telltale phrases like &#8216;due process&#8217;&#8221; in DOJ memos.</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fc7abacb8-7fad-4250-9441-6c39514f1b25_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/98193622-57ec-4de0-a288-7d7b35690d1e?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Calling it a &#8220;serious breach of the Department of Justice&#8217;s code of conduct,&#8221; on Wednesday Attorney General Pam Bondi announced that she had terminated a career DOJ employee who was caught with a copy of the U.S. Constitution on his desk.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Bondi said that the employee, who had worked at the department for 37 years, had &#8220;raised suspicions&#8221; by using &#8220;telltale phrases like &#8216;due process&#8217;&#8221; in DOJ memos.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">At Bondi&#8217;s direction, US marshals ransacked his office, discovered the offending document, and frog-marched him out of the building.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Bondi took the opportunity to remind all DOJ staffers that the U.S. Constitution is on the Republican Party&#8217;s banned reading list.</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><strong>TBR Question of the Day: What would be a better job for Pam Bondi?</strong></p><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 1.6em;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"></td><td class="content" align="left" width="1456" style="text-align: center;"><a class="image-link" rel="" target="_blank" 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src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA5MTEwNDA4LjMuZDhhYTQwYTRiZmJiOGQ3Y0BtZy1kMC5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQwLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDg4MTcwMiwidCI6Im5ld3NsZXR0ZXIiLCJhIjoiZXZlcnlvbmUiLCJzIjoyMzM3NjU2LCJjIjoicG9zdCIsImYiOnRydWUsInBvc2l0aW9uIjoiYm90dG9tIiwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MTk3Mjk1LCJleHAiOjE3NDY3ODkyOTUsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoiZW8ifQ.lIidbPOlpKHWHE7JUp0kXjSnyFSaa7-NHqd17F86EfY" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><img width="1" height="1" alt="" 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screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy 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} @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDA5MjEzMDEyLjMuM2EzZTg3ODZhMTUyMTU3N0BtZy1kMS5zdWJzdGFjay5jb20-IiwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJyIjoiYm9yb3dpdHpAY29ucmFkcmV5bm9sZHMuY29tIiwiZCI6Im1nLWQxLnN1YnN0YWNrLmNvbSIsInAiOjE2MDk1NDU5NSwidCI6InBvZGNhc3QiLCJhIjoib25seV9wYWlkIiwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiYyI6InBvc3QiLCJmIjp0cnVlLCJwb3NpdGlvbiI6InRvcCIsImlhdCI6MTc0NDIzNDUwNiwiZXhwIjoxNzQ2ODI2NTA2LCJpc3MiOiJwdWItMCIsInN1YiI6ImVvIn0.1-Qy8Mvb6x12k0HNqx-sINpErawwVA7kBbSzMlY6pLI" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">Watch now (19 mins) | The Andy Borowitz Show</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3N1YnNjcmliZT91dG1fc291cmNlPWVtYWlsJnV0bV9jYW1wYWlnbj1lbWFpbC1zdWJzY3JpYmUmcj0zbGlwdnQmbmV4dD1odHRwcyUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5ib3Jvd2l0enJlcG9ydC5jb20lMkZwJTJGdGhlLWZhbGwtb2YtdHJ1bXAiLCJwIjoxNjA5NTQ1OTUsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImYiOnRydWUsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MjM0NTA0LCJleHAiOjE3NDY4MjY1MDQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0wIiwic3ViIjoibGluay1yZWRpcmVjdCJ9.7uKS5LdvmR_deyI2-0_nX0wJPLHzw7dtl3V4QqIKcjk?" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;-webkit-text-decoration-line: underline;text-decoration-line: underline;">Subscribe here</a> for more</span></div></span></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><table class="header graphic-header" role="presentation" style="border-spacing: 0;padding: 16px 0 32px;"><tbody><tr><td align="center" style="text-align: center;padding: 0;"><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2/eyJlIjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuYm9yb3dpdHpyZXBvcnQuY29tL3AvdGhlLWZhbGwtb2YtdHJ1bXA_dXRtX2NhbXBhaWduPWVtYWlsLWhhbGYtcG9zdCZyPTNsaXB2dCZ0b2tlbj1leUoxYzJWeVgybGtJam95TVRjMU5ETTRNVGNzSW5CdmMzUmZhV1FpT2pFMk1EazFORFU1TlN3aWFXRjBJam94TnpRME1qTTBOVEEwTENKbGVIQWlPakUzTkRZNE1qWTFNRFFzSW1semN5STZJbkIxWWkweU16TTNOalUySWl3aWMzVmlJam9pY0c5emRDMXlaV0ZqZEdsdmJpSjkudE1GOHp1Y2ZoTGVlU0pxb3JoMjRBY3FNd243VTI5SWN2VGZ0SW5BNE9FSSIsInAiOjE2MDk1NDU5NSwicyI6MjMzNzY1NiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwidSI6MjE3NTQzODE3LCJpYXQiOjE3NDQyMzQ1MDQsImV4cCI6MTc0NjgyNjUwNCwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJsaW5rLXJlZGlyZWN0In0.fDmAHq5s0VmpEIS6MVFEvY4PupWQvso6r_JN6GYxNiI?"><img class="header-image" role="presentation" width="550" height="136" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F49624381-debf-4308-95a6-d9610050db29_2000x492.png" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;max-width: 550px;display: block;margin: 0 auto;height: auto;width: 100%;"></a></td></tr></tbody></table><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="width:100%;"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;width:100%;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160954595&utm_source=podcast-email&play_audio=true&r=3lipvt&utm_campaign=email-play-on-substack&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDk1NDU5NSwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MjM0NTA0LCJleHAiOjE3NDY4MjY1MDQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.tMF8zucfhLeeSJqorh24AcqMwn7U29IcvTftInA4OEI&utm_content=watch_now_gif"><img src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1138,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Facd4fd16-223b-459b-8bd4-6e1ff890413c_320x180.gif" alt="Ruth Ben Ghiat.mp4" style="max-width: 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UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 0;line-height: 36px;font-size: 32px;"><a href="https://substack.com/app-link/post?publication_id=2337656&post_id=160954595&utm_source=post-email-title&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=3lipvt&token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjoyMTc1NDM4MTcsInBvc3RfaWQiOjE2MDk1NDU5NSwiaWF0IjoxNzQ0MjM0NTA0LCJleHAiOjE3NDY4MjY1MDQsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yMzM3NjU2Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.tMF8zucfhLeeSJqorh24AcqMwn7U29IcvTftInA4OEI" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: none;">The Fall of Trump</a></h1><h3 class="subtitle" style="font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI 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'Segoe UI Emoji', 'Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: 400;"><h3 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.375em;margin-top: 0;margin-bottom: 0;"><span>BREAKING: The stock market rallied today on the news that Donald Trump is a complete and total wimp. (Not really news, actually.) Facing a rebellion from oligarchs and his own party, he blinked, and dealt a fatal blow to his image as a strongman. </span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/2bce80f7-5c7c-454a-8562-0f348b97b775?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">Ruth Ben-Ghiat</a><span>, the great historian and expert in authoritarianism, predicts the brutal reckoning that await&#8230;</span></h3></div></div><div class="paywall paywall-white-background" data-testid="paywall" data-component-name="Paywall" style="position: relative;font-family: system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';text-align: center;margin-bottom: 16px;cursor: default;-webkit-user-select: none;-moz-user-select: none;-ms-user-select: none;user-select: none;line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;padding: 32px 24px 16px 24px;background: 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.markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description, .typography.editor .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .typography .markup .apple-podcast-container, .typography.editor .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { .typography .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link, .typography.editor .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container { height: 38px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.comment { height: 38px; line-height: 38px; padding-right: 10px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container .separator { display: block; margin: 0; height: 8px; border-left: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { .share-button-container a.share.first img { padding-left: 0; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { .share-button-container a.mobile { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container { padding: 36px; height: 680px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .settings-add-pub-modal-wrapper .container .add-recommending-pub-modal-container .footer { position: absolute; bottom: 36px; margin: 0px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .header-anchor-parent { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .post { padding: 16px 0 0 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .post-label { margin-top: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-header .meta-author-wrap.alternative-meta .meta-right-column .post-meta { margin-top: 6px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .footer-facepile-container { height: 64px; padding: 0 16px; display: flex; align-items: center; justify-content: flex-start; width: 100%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.use-separators { justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .post-footer.next-prev { height: 64px; justify-content: space-between; box-sizing: border-box; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-table-row { display: flex; flex-direction: row; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-userhead-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-cell { flex-grow: 1; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-body-table-row { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell, .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { display: block; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-copy-cell { margin: 0 0 16px 0; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls-cell { width: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls { margin: auto; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-controls .button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDEwMTM0NTI0LjMuNTIxYTg0M2RiZDU3M2RhMUBtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTYwOTU2NzE5LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDQyOTI5MTYsImV4cCI6MTc0Njg4NDkxNiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.MvAJmWDr6qNkLZ--jfg0-Q8ST5VbwMBY1M5pJ2SYQH0" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#8220;There&#8217;s a human cost here that the public needs to know about.&#8221;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa5dacacc-3927-46c1-88f8-228637df9f12_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Andrew Harnik/Getty Images</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/b925fd85-a801-4095-b6b6-9fc801e42bfa?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;In a rare public statement, Clarence Thomas warned on Thursday that the whipsawing stock market could force billionaires who have hosted him and Samuel Alito on luxury cruises to sell their yachts.</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;I usually bite my tongue, but the threat to these cruises impels me to speak out,&#8221; he said. &#8220;There&#8217;s a human cost here the public needs to know about.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Thomas reported that Alito&#8217;s wife is &#8220;in a state of panic&#8221; about losing her superyacht vacations, adding, &#8220;She&#8217;s been flying their flag upside down all week.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">As for his own wife, Thomas said, &#8220;Ginni is mad as hell, and you don&#8217;t want to make Ginni mad. She&#8217;s already tried to overthrow one government.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;"><strong>TBR Question of the Day: Where would you like to see Clarence and Ginni take a vacation?</strong></h4><p class="button-wrapper" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton" 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.button.primary { width: 100%; } .post-contributor-footer .post-contributor-bio-text { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 768px) { .post-silhouette { padding: 32px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-title { margin-top: 10.44225025px; height: 120px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta { width: 75%; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-silhouette .post-silhouette-meta.with-byline-image { margin: 20px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { padding-right: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 14px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .use-theme-bg .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication, .post-meta.alternative-meta .post-meta-item.guest-author-publication { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button { height: 36px !important; /* important to override in-line height style on emails */ } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button .meta-button-label { display: none; } .post-meta .post-meta-item .post-meta-button > svg { margin-right: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { .post-meta .post-meta-item { font-size: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post .floating-subscribe-button { bottom: 20px; right: 20px; } } @media all and (-ms-high-contrast: none), (-ms-high-contrast: active) { body .markup table.image-wrapper img, body .markup table.kindle-wrapper img { max-width: 550px; } } @media (max-width: 1024px) { body .image2-align-left.image2-align-left.image2-align-left, body .image2-align-right.image2-align-right.image2-align-right { float: none; margin: 1em auto; max-width: 100%; width: 100%; padding: 0; } body .image2-align-right.image2-align-right.image2-align-right .image2-inset, body .image2-align-left.image2-align-left.image2-align-left .image2-inset { display: flex; justify-content: center; } body .image2-align-left.image2-align-left.image2-align-left.thefp, body .image2-align-right.image2-align-right.image2-align-right.thefp { margin: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.youtube-overlay, body .markup div.vimeo-overlay { display: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 370px) { body .markup div.tiktok-wrap { width: calc(95vw - 32px); height: calc((95vw - 32px - 2px) / 0.485714); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.embedded-publication-wrap .embedded-publication.show-subscribe { padding: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe { padding: 0px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.subscription-widget-wrap-editor .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button, body .markup div.captioned-button-wrap .subscription-widget.show-subscribe .subscription-widget-subscribe .button { padding: 10px 12px; min-width: 110px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet { padding: 12px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-text { font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.two, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.three, body .markup .tweet .tweet-photos-container.four { height: 200px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-img { max-height: 180px; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .tweet a.expanded-link .expanded-link-description { display: none; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { body .markup .apple-podcast-container { width: unset; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed img.install-substack-app-embed-img { margin: 0 auto 16px auto; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-text { margin: 0 0 12px 0; max-width: 100%; width: auto; text-align: center; } } @media (max-width: 420px) { body .markup .install-substack-app-embed .install-substack-app-embed-link { display: flex; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { body .header a.logo { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 420px) { body .subscription-receipt table:first-of-type .subscription-amount .subscription-discount { width: 72px !important; } } @media screen and (min-width: 481px) { body .share-button-container { height: auto; } } @media screen and (max-width: 480px) { body .share-button-container .separator { display: block !important; margin: 0 !important; height: 8px !important; border-left: none !important; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .digest .item .post-meta-item.audience { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 500px) { .digest-publication .logo img { width: 42px; height: 42px; border-radius: 8px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comments-page .container .comment-list .collapsed-reply { margin-left: calc(10 + 32px - 24px); } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .comment > .comment-list { padding-left: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .finish-magic-login-modal .modal-content .container { padding: 24px 0; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-b3 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .reader2-text-h4 { line-height: 24px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .user-profile-modal { padding-left: 12px; padding-right: 12px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .subscribe-widget form.form .sideBySideWrap button.rightButton { padding: 10px 12px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .pub-icon:hover .logo-hover, .feed-item-icon:hover .logo-hover { display: block; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper { width: 100%; padding: 16px; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button-wrapper:empty { display: none; } .post-ufi.single-full-width-button .post-ufi-button { width: 100%; justify-content: center; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor { padding: 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 768px) { .file-embed-wrapper-editor:active { padding: 0; } } @media only screen and (max-width: 650px) { .file-embed-button.wide, .file-embed-error-button.wide { display: none; } } @media only screen and (min-width: 630px) { .file-embed-button.narrow, .file-embed-error-button.narrow { display: none; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player { min-width: 500px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress { border-left-width: 16px; border-right-width: 16px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-progress .audio-player-progress-bar .audio-player-progress-bar-popup { top: -54px; } } @media (min-width: 250px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player { padding: 32px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:last-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 300px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-title { margin-top: 16px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 15%; width: 15%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-substack-logo { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 350px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 25%; width: 25%; display: block; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { display: flex; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button:first-of-type { display: block; } } @media (min-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 40%; width: 40%; } } @media (max-width: 400px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group { margin-top: 12px; } .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .btn-group .button { font-size: 13px; padding: 6px 12px; height: auto; margin-top: 10px; } } @media (min-width: 600px) { .audio-player-wrapper-fancy .audio-player .audio-player-hero-image-container { padding-top: 55%; width: 55%; } } @media (max-width: 650px) { .poll-editor-modal { min-width: calc(100% - 20px); } } @media (max-width: 750px) { .poll-embed .poll-anchor-target .poll-anchor-copy-button { left: 8px; top: 45px; } } @media screen and (min-width: 541px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { width: 552px; padding: 26px 24px; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-table .modal-row .modal-content > .container { padding: 40px 0; } } @media screen and (max-width: 650px) { .poll-embed .poll-wrapper.poll-web .poll-dialog .modal-row .modal-cell .modal-exit-btn { margin-right: -20px; } }</style></head><body class="email-body" style="font-kerning: auto;"><img src="https://eotrx.substackcdn.com/open?token=eyJtIjoiPDIwMjUwNDExMTEwMzE2LjMuODM1NWVkNTQyODU0MGNkN0BtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tPiIsInUiOjIxNzU0MzgxNywiciI6ImJvcm93aXR6QGNvbnJhZHJleW5vbGRzLmNvbSIsImQiOiJtZzIuc3Vic3RhY2suY29tIiwicCI6MTYxMDMzMTc0LCJ0IjoibmV3c2xldHRlciIsImEiOiJldmVyeW9uZSIsInMiOjIzMzc2NTYsImMiOiJwb3N0IiwiZiI6dHJ1ZSwicG9zaXRpb24iOiJ0b3AiLCJpYXQiOjE3NDQzNzAwMDIsImV4cCI6MTc0Njk2MjAwMiwiaXNzIjoicHViLTAiLCJzdWIiOiJlbyJ9.ywmzA2KrBT2KZlyG-nEyqiCkgkJVUwEc4MirheQhxck" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" style="height:1px !important;width:1px !important;border-width:0 !important;margin-top:0 !important;margin-bottom:0 !important;margin-right:0 !important;margin-left:0 !important;padding-top:0 !important;padding-bottom:0 !important;padding-right:0 !important;padding-left:0 !important;"/><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">"He was begging me like a dog, so I said yes.&#8221;</div><div class="preview" style="display:none;font-size:1px;color:#333333;line-height:1px;max-height:0px;max-width:0px;opacity:0;overflow:hidden;">&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; 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&nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;&#847; &nbsp; &#8199; &#173;</div><table class="email-body-container" role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550"></td><td></td></tr><tr><td></td><td class="content" width="550" align="left"><div style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;max-width: 550px;width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;overflow-wrap: break-word;"><table role="presentation" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td align="right" style="height:20px;"><table role="presentation" width="auto" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tbody><tr><td style="vertical-align:middle;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ tw-font-body tw-text-ssm tw-text-substack-secondary" style="font-family: SF Pro Text, -apple-system, system-ui, BlinkMacSystemFont, Inter, Segoe UI, Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, Apple Color Emoji, Segoe UI Emoji, Segoe UI Symbol;font-size: 13px;color: unset;list-style: none;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><div class="pencraft pc-reset align-right-VJbKw5 size-12-mmZ61m reset-IxiVJZ" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-align: right;font-size: 12px;line-height: 16px;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;"><span class="pencraft pc-reset reset-IxiVJZ" translated="" style="list-style: none;color: unset;text-decoration: unset;margin: 0;">Forwarded this email? <a class="pencraft pc-reset decoration-underline-ClTkYc reset-IxiVJZ" 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src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/w_1100,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fda2b3ef5-53b5-4991-a4c4-002565e58d91_1024x683.heic" style="border: none !important;vertical-align: middle;display: block;-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic;height: auto;margin-bottom: 0;width: auto !important;max-width: 100% !important;margin: 0 auto;"></a></td><td style="text-align: center;"></td></tr></tbody></table><figcaption class="image-caption" style="box-sizing: content-box;color: #777777;font-size: 14px;line-height: 20px;font-weight: 400;letter-spacing: -.15px;margin-top: 8px;width: 70%;padding-left: 15%;padding-right: 15%;text-align: center;">Mandel Ngan/AFP</figcaption></figure></div><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;"><span>WASHINGTON (</span><a href="https://substack.com/redirect/6e71ea94-6d42-4d5c-a121-f2507c3aabba?j=eyJ1IjoiM2xpcHZ0In0.DGeL49qQ6JlJlA99Af4vw-uUiRNcD8aTaRaWQ-VtcAY" rel="" style="color: rgb(54,55,55);text-decoration: underline;">The Borowitz Report</a><span>)&#8212;Donald J. Trump stunned Wall Street on Friday by revealing that the spate of tariffs roiling global markets were his son Eric&#8217;s &#8220;dumb idea.&#8221;</span></p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;When Eric first pitched the idea of tariffs, I thought the whole concept sounded kind of out there,&#8221; he said. &#8220;But he was begging me like a dog, so I said yes.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">Trump said that it was important for Eric to know that his tariff scheme was &#8220;a disaster,&#8221; adding, &#8220;When you make a mistake this huge, you&#8217;ve got to own it.&#8221;</p><p style="margin: 0 0 20px 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 26px;font-size: 16px;">&#8220;Maybe I shouldn&#8217;t have let him do the tariffs, but I felt bad because the poor guy has nothing going for him,&#8221; he said. &#8220;It&#8217;s been tough growing up in the shadow of a superstar like Don, Jr.&#8221;</p><h4 class="header-anchor-post" style="position: relative;--highlight-bg: rgba(var(--color-bg-accent-themed-rgb), 0.2);font-family: 'SF Pro Display',-apple-system-headline,system-ui,-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,'Segoe UI',Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,'Apple Color Emoji','Segoe UI Emoji','Segoe UI Symbol';font-weight: bold;-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased;-moz-osx-font-smoothing: antialiased;-webkit-appearance: optimizelegibility;-moz-appearance: optimizelegibility;appearance: optimizelegibility;margin: 1em 0 0.625em 0;color: rgb(54,55,55);line-height: 1.16em;font-size: 1.125em;">TBR Question of the Day: What else is Eric&#8217;s fault?</h4><div class="captioned-image-container-static" style="font-size: 16px;line-height: 26px;margin: 32px auto;"><figure style="width: 100%;margin: 0 auto;"><table class="image-wrapper" data-component-name="Image2ToDOMStatic" width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" style="mso-padding-alt: 1em 0 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